What do you do when you’ve become rich and famous for writing a #1 best-selling book about your drunken, sexual misadventures? I’ll tell you what I do: I write another fucking book.
Tucker Max
I’M GIVING AWAY A COPY OF ASSHOLES FINISH FIRST!!!!
God bless Tucker Max. He tells the stories that most don’t have the balls to tell. His first book, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, was a New York Times bestseller and there is no reason to think Assholes Finish First will be any different.
I was able to interview Tucker Max in Buffalo (you can read the whole interview HERE) and we talked about how the new book compares to the first book. Here’s what he had to say:
The second book is just, I had a ton more stories. A lot of stories in here happened before this came out. [taps my copy of BEER IN HELL] I could have put them in the first one, but I thought, “how thick can this book be.”
The first half of this one is very much like BEER IN HELL, but the second half stuff that happened AFTER BEER IN HELL. I call it, “The post-fame sex stories”. It’s about how my relationship with women changed after I became famous.
It was a lot of the same sex stories, but now the girls were coming to me instead of me coming to them.
One would think that stories of drinking and getting laid would be strictly for the boys, but he has as many female fans as he does male. His Buffalo book signing looked to be 50/50 and I personally know a few well educated women with great careers who adore him and his books.
The book is absolutely hilarious and is a great Christmas or Hanukkah gift for the person who doesn’t have a stick up their ass. On second thought, if they do have a stick up their ass, get it for them. Maybe it will dislodge it.
Win an autographed copy of Assholes Finish First.
I want you to send me a description of a funny/bad date you’ve had or a crazy night drinking with the guys or with the girls. Keep it to around 100 words max. I will take the top three to the judges. Who are the judges?
Lady of the House (Checking The Electrical Box, @ieatmykidzsnack)
Ron Mattocks (Clark Kent’s Lunchbox, @CK_Lunchbox)
Jennie (Nucking Futs Mama, @NuckingFutsMama)
Chopper Papa (Chopper Papa, @Chopperpapa)
All stories must be received by 11:59 PM on Friday, December 3, 2010. The winner will be announced on Tuesday December 7 and the autographed book will be mailed once I have your address.
Submit your story via comment or by using the “Contact J.R.” button at the top of the page.
Was this review written for The Good Men Project ? IF so, it seems counterintuitive.
– Ross
Not sure why a man “finishing first” is actually a good thing. Amirite, ladies, amirite? Nudge, nudge.
Reminds me of the old adage:
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Wow, five minutes of my life I won’t get back. Thought I would get some insight, instead just got a bunch of people bragging about their irresponsible, high-risk sexual encounters.
BTW can anyone tell me why “Tucker Max” took as his pseudonym the name of one of the most notorious prisons in the Arkansas Department of Corrections system?
Not judgin’ , just sayin’
Visiting a friend in college, sets me up with a cute little red-head. Go to the local bar and indulge. At little rubby-dubby while dancing, she whispers in my ear, did you take your vitamins today?. I looked like a deer in the head lights. We go back to her place have a couple of beers and start dancing around the room. Her room-mate comes home quite buzzed and we all start dancing together. The girls give each other a look and I know whats coming. They both pulled me by the hand and go in the bedroom. They rocked… Read more »
Started out as the DD my first night of college. Drove an SUV back from the club with about 15 people in it. KY license plates with an IL license and get stopped at a road block. People hiding under clothes because the whole car was underage drunks. Get back me and 2 friends split a 1/5 of vodka the really cheap kind. I drink 3/4 of the bottle and the girl drinking with us give me the screw me eyes and we fool around and I lose my virginity. Then wake up the next morning with puke all over… Read more »
Went to the playboy mansion with my husband, long story 😉 I decided we couldn’t be there without sneaking off & having some sexy time. Seriously, you can’t go to Hef’s & not have sex!! Anyway I got so excited running down a path in his forest/woods I fell into a huge hole (not mine, it’s petite) & twisted my ankle. Thankfully I was drunk enough not to feel pain & we did manage to get a quickie in!
And we all know how I feel about online dating, living at my mom’s and showing off my old varsity jacket. Then there’s the Marlboro-Shiraz coated tongue assault… and the hooker at the rave in Vegas… Oh wait! I’m judging. Got it.
arent you glad I introduced you to the world of Tucker Max?
the night out with the girls… We were at a great dance club in the 330, and I was HAMMERED. I thought it would be a GREAT idea to get up on the bar and shake my ass for the men…. got up there just fine, began to dance my ass off— hit a patch of beer ont he bar, slipped and fell RIGHT OFF THE BAR……. skirt over my hips, thong showing and the wonderfu DJ hit up the mic to point out my wonderful Score Rating 10 fall off the bar…. the club was silent, I got up,… Read more »
i was on a date with this ass*ole and we were at our favorite liquor establishment when a girl with huge tits walks in… he eyes her up then says– to me, “damn, I’d like to motor boat those tits”…… leaves me at the bar and goes to talk to her…. needless to say, I left him with the tab and went home…. actually I went to my dude on the side for some good action……
Nice! You get pissed off at a guy for treating you like seconds, so you go make a call on the guy your treating like seconds.
Mark,
I’ve re-read this a couple of times and I don’t see where I got pissed at anyone for anything. Can you help me out here and show me whatI said? Thanks.
JR
Generally, calling someone an as*hole and stiffing them on the tab because they did something you didn’t like, is a demonstration of anger.
Mark,
Thanks for the reply. I see where the confusion is. Im not the author of the book. This was a book review. I’m sorry if you didn’t realize that. Your comments need to be directed to Tucker Max, the author. He can be reached at http://www.tuckermax.com.
Actually, my comment was directed at the comment by The Rowing Chic November 30, 2010 at 5:57 pm., not to you or the author. Where she describes going on a date, her dating dropping her for another bigger breasted women, so she returns to the guy she effectively drops for other guys. Perhaps you are not seeing the comments properly threaded?
You are a hypocrite and a filthy slut.
I hate that you complained about what he did to you so you do the same thing back to him.
I feel sorry for that man.
You should be ashamed of yourself get a life !!!