Adventures in Polyamory

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About Henry Vandenburgh

Henry Vandenburgh is a professor of sociology at Bridgewater State University. He is particularly interested in issues of sexual freedom.


  1. after you said, ‘no’. did you immediately stop phoning her, did she try to phone you?

  2. Henry Vandenburgh says:

    I was always the phoner, except for a few times. By the ten month mark, I phoned her rarely. This was all a long time ago (1980.) We continued to see them socially for a few years. Since I usually get limerant (fall in love with) women with whom I’m sleeping, I’m not sure habitual polyamory would work for me. I usually am not all that interested in continuing sex with women with whom I’m not limerant. (Oh, that’s wrong. There are two notable exceptions.)

  3. STD’s? Herpes? HIV? Any worries concerning these issues?

    Jealousy? When I have suggested or even joked about any remote interest in another person my partner would become rabidly offended (although it was okay for him to look at other women)….

    • Nick, mostly says:

      In 1980 HIV wasn’t on the radar, and it was a “gay” disease for some time after that.
      I think, for the most part, herpes isn’t that big a deal except during outbreaks (although I can’t speak from personal experience).

      I’ve let my wife know I’m fine with her having other partners, but she’s (thus far) not interested.

  4. Henry Vandenburgh says:

    HIV was not to emerge for a couple more years. We were spared any other STDs.

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