Courtesy of monkey in the open thread, we got a heads-up to this appalling site about how much little boys suck. I’d like to say it’s about something else, but it really isn’t. It’s got child-focused misandry and no other fucking ingredients.
It really says something that this entire fake site is an ad intended to “address the issue” of parents disproportionately expressing a preference for boys. I mean, first and most obviously, it doesn’t address that issue at all, so… well done, I guess. Second, even if that is your intent, could you really not come up with anything other than blatant and baldfaced boy-bashing, you blithering bare-balled bandicoot-buggerers? (That may have been a bit biased or bullheaded. My bad. I’m bothered and I’m binging.)
On top of that, this whole goddamn thing is so gender-norm enforcing that it makes me… well, lapse into self-indulgent alliteration like Stan Lee on meth, obviously. I mean, seriously, the implication is pretty obviously that little girls don’t randomly destroy things, injure themselves, make messes, or generally wreak havoc wherever they set their dainty little feet. Now, perhaps the little girls I’ve known are not a great control group, but… let’s just say my data does not match theirs. Then again, they don’t actually have any data. They openly admit they just made up a bunch of fake anecdotes to support their bullshit, relying on people going “Ha-ha, ain’t it the truth?” It’s what our friend Holly calls a that-always-happens joke, and it’s incredibly insulting.
The ridiculous part, for me, is that I’m generally sympathetic to the issue they’re trying and failing to address. I do think parental gender preference is a problem, ranging from merely troubling in American culture to hugely toxic in some others. In other words, this site can’t persuade me on an issue I already agree with. That’s like an ad for a store that sells nothing but comic books, whisky, and show tunes; if you can’t sell me on that, you are really, really bad at your job.
Now that it’s boy versus girl…
My mother got four male-assigned-at-birth kids. She might have tried for a fifth to get a female-assigned-at-birth one, but decided not to. She still did get a female kid, me. I’m her firstborn.
I was really surprised to see that story, because most people of my acquaintance want at least one boy and at least one girl. People always congratulate me on having one of each and say things like, “I guess you’re done having kids now.”
@pocketjacks
“It’s changed to 94%, now. Their network of uro-aquariular informants and spy pigeons must have fed them their daily update.”
I think maybe they just have one boy on hand, and they just ask him how likely he thinks it is that he’ll pee in their fishtank today.
“I do think parental gender preference is a problem” Just out of curiosity, do you differentiate between blanket preferences for one gender, versus that of parents with already a line of kids, looking to “balance the family”? Because most gender selected babies in the US are of the second group, I believe. Some hardline positions against parental gender preference seem a lot like some arguments against operative transsexualism. “Why should it matter what the biological gender is?! Anything one gender can do, the other can do as well, caring about it is supporting gender essentialism!” @orangeban “Heh, my favourite thing… Read more »
I recall overhearing a conversation of a pregnant acquaintance in college, once. She was having a boy and was already deeply saddened that she would, therefore, necessarily have nothing in common with her child. Fortunately, she added, the little boy’s father and uncles would totally do tons of boy stuff with him, like fishing and car mechanics.
Sigh.
@orangeban
Not every girl needs to squat to pee in the fishtank, and I’m not just counting those girls who have penises instead of vaginas.
And yeah, I never understand the strange confluence of misandry and transmisogyny that exists today in western society. Though as one YouTuber pointed out, it’s because a true misandrist hates anyone ever associated with the idea of maleness.
“and what bizarro helicopter parent thinks a kid jumping in a leaf pile will end in tragedy?”
I didn’t see what you mean on that site so I don’t know context but it’s (or rather should be) common knowledge that when you are driving you should be aware to not run over children who might be stupid enough to be playing in the pile of leaves on the street. As if a driver can see them buried in there…Every season I get a notice from the town warning me of this.
All those anecdotes make me feel like such a meek, quiet little thing. I went to the ER a bunch of times, but that was just because I was clumsy. I didn’t start getting rambunctious until my brother and I got into martial arts as teens. Well, except for whacking bee-hives and wasps nest. I actually did that a couple of times.
huh. That’s a weird mix of awful and actually funny and/or insightful (like the parent who wanted boys because he/she liked sports and ended up with bookish sons and a sporty daughter)
and what bizarro helicopter parent thinks a kid jumping in a leaf pile will end in tragedy?
Ugh, why did raising awareness have to be achieved thorugh bashing baby boys? When I remember the time back when I was in elementary school or the after school care centre, both girls and boys wanted to play with the same toys; there were always the lucky kids who were allowed to play with the new Polly Pocket or the new Hot Wheels. We all actually played together, and we were all pretty much the same when it came to destructive behaviour. When you’re raising kids differently, and expecting different things from them, it seems like a no-brainer that they… Read more »
http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2010/07/the-end-of-men/8135/?single_page=true “In the ’90s, when Ericsson looked into the numbers for the two dozen or so clinics that use his process, he discovered, to his surprise, that couples were requesting more girls than boys, a gap that has persisted, even though Ericsson advertises the method as more effective for producing boys. In some clinics, Ericsson has said, the ratio is now as high as 2 to 1. Polling data on American sex preference is sparse, and does not show a clear preference for girls. But the picture from the doctor’s office unambiguously does. A newer method for sperm selection, called… Read more »
@Alexander: If that’s true, it’s just as disturbing as a heavy preference the other way. Fucking gender essentialism, I swear…
Well, they managed to prove that two wrongs don’t make a right, but not much else . . .
@monkey: It was the suburban shuttle that feeds the train. Most of the people on it are neighbors. The train, on the other hand, is definitely a “no socialization” zone. @debaser71: Well it’s not like I expected an academic discussion of privilege and kyriarchy. I was, however, hoping for someone to say “ya know, your right! my cousin’s friend’s brother’s little girl refuses to play with barbies!” or something. What irked me about his story was not so much that the kids were conforming to gender roles, but that the father was reinforcing them for his kid. The genderblogs have… Read more »
@Ramesses, I did all those things as a little girl, though my umbrella-jump was hurling myself out of a tree rather than from the roof!
Except the ER visit. I don’t know HOW I managed never to seriously injure myself.
Anyway, it’s seriously a gross experience to read that site – made-up tweets about how awful little boys are? Really? When will we stop tearing down one gender in an effort to “defend” the other…
Heh, my favourite thing on statistic (which I know are fake) is the one that says, “Boys are 96% more likely to pee in the fish tank.” Firstly I get giggles figuring out how they would even find that statistic, but secondly, of course boys are more likely to pee in fish tanks, boys can just stand beside it, but girls would have to sort of squat over it.
*facepalms* girls don’t destroy things?!? I’d like to invite these folks to take a look at my childhood home…my sister and I did more damage than my two boys have ever done. And damn….what an insulting site.
From what I know about science and my own personal experience…it’s not uncommon for girls and boys to separate themselves based on their sex. Noticing sex differences happens early and easily (for the most part). With that said, I don’t like absolutist language. But I try not to hold people in general pleasant random chat to a high standard of nuanced discourse. I think “depends on the girl” was a good response.
@DysgraphicProgrammer:
Not to go off on a tangent, but where do you live that people actually talk to each other on the bus?
I was in a discussion just last night, on the bus home. One parent was telling a story that ended with “Well, *of course* she didn’t want to play [forgotten] with you, she’s a GIRL”.
I piped up: “Well, it depends on the girl” All the other bus riders around nodded in agreement with my comment… and proceed to tell more stories about how boys were like this and girls were like that and never the twain shall meet.
My impression was based on reading about medical gender selection, so that explains it
JE: Not quite true, but not completely wrong either. Gallup have run surveys for a few decades showing that USians would prefer a boy when asked “If you can have only one child, which gender would you prefer?”. However when it comes to US adoptions and US purchase of gender selection “treatments” the picture is quite the opposite. See my comment on the open thread for statistics and links to sources.
I had gotten the impression that in western countries where this website is most likely to be seen parents tend to prefer girls
You can’t do Swiftian satire on the Internet anyway, because no matter how crazy you get, there’s always someone else who’s saying something just as crazy and means it.
You know, I am usually one of the first to defend satire in the name of advocacy, but this website just misses the mark. I’m not exactly sure what the reason IS per-se. There is even a handy disclaimer right there on the front page: “This site isn’t completely real. It’s a project for Fast Company magazine, designed to address the issue of perspective parents disproportionately wanting a boy. The stats aren’t real. The submissions aren’t real. But the issue is. So look around. Enjoy yourself. And maybe learn something in the process.” Given the hate, bigotry, fake statistics, the… Read more »