Have you ever wondered if someone’s attracted to you and you don’t even realize it?
It can sometimes be hard to tell unless someone is obvious about their interest because attraction typically appears first on the micro-level. It’s important to first decipher if the person might simply be a highly effective communicator with a high social IQ, who is adept at making people feel seen and heard with their attentiveness.
On the contrary, people who are attracted to you might send mixed signals, especially if someone is anxious around someone they’re attracted to. So for all these signs, please use your intuition to decipher the clues.
This article is for educational purposes and is based on personal opinions. This article is not a substitute for professional advice, but for general guidance. We advise you to always listen to your intuition and always do what is right for you. Let’s begin.
1. Mirroring behavior
According to clinical psychologist Holly Schiff, mirroring is when someone subconsciously attempts to bond with you through matching your behavior.
If you notice someone is making similar facial expressions as you, placing their body in a similar posture, or even matching your energy levels. They may find your presence attractive enough to express their interest through this nonverbal affirmation.
Note that most people aren’t likely to consciously catch themselves doing so. But if you start to notice your date is matching your standing posture and speech mannerisms. It’s a great sign of attraction it’s also why couples tend to start looking and acting similar after some time.
2. Physical flirtation
People who have physical touch as their love language might throw in some physical flirtation to show their interest in you, such as a lingering hug a pat on your arm or shoulder, accidentally grazing your hand, or touching the mid to lower part of your back. Take notice of whether they seem communicative with everyone with their physical touch, or if it’s only you that they’re extra attentive to in this form.
Some people may use physical touch as a bonding technique to help themselves and others feel more comfortable in their presence. So it could be that they’d be nervous about acting that way towards someone they’re attracted to.
3. Belly button alignment
Margaret stone, a licensed therapist and dating coach states that aligning one’s belly button with another is a sign of attraction, trust, and security. Something which is also done subconsciously.
Couples who tend to face each other even when in large groups are doing so to feel socially safe on a subconscious level. Similarly, when someone is attracted to you, their body will give clues that they’d like to become closer to you physically or emotionally by pointing themselves directly to you.
Or when someone is engaging in conversation, their feet may point towards the person they’re speaking with, that they’re interested in.
4. Open body language
In 2016 a study on the importance and impact of body language on speed dating. Researchers found that participants who displayed open nonverbal behavior were deemed as dominant and attractive versus those who demonstrated contractive cues.
While it’s now considered scientifically proven that open body language, like crossing your arms, taking up space, and standing with a strict posture can make you seem more attractive.
It’s also true that those who are attracted to you will appear more open in their body language as well. If they’re keeping their bodies vulnerable and in a welcoming stance, they feel comfortable and safe around you. On the other hand, if they seem to be closed off with their body, it might be their way of non-verbally asking for some space.
5. Eyebrow flash
This one might be hard to notice, but if you do catch it, take it as a good sign.
An eyebrow flash or an eyebrow raised is considered a microexpression, which means it only appears on the person’s face for a split second. Microexpressions are the most telling signs of someone’s true emotions, even when their words or conscious actions say otherwise.
A quick raising of the eyebrows, especially when someone first sees you walking towards them, for example, could be expressing their genuine excitement that you’ve arrived. Contrast that with eyes that narrow with downward turning eyebrows when someone is unhappy to see strangers who find you attractive while walking past you might quickly flash their eyebrows as a subtle sign of surprise or delight in what they’re seeing.
But note that an eyebrow raise that remains raised might be less attraction and more surprise or shock.
6. Voice changes
Ever notice your best friend’s voice becoming suddenly higher or deeper while in the company of their crush?
Well, don’t judge them for it.
Because it’s quite likely that you unconsciously do the same in the presence of someone you’re attracted to as well. A study conducted in 2014 found that people speaking to someone they find attractive tend to change the tone and strength and pitch of their voice when doing so.
According to this study, it’s even possible for those listening in between two who are attracted to each other to tell there’s chemistry happening. Take note of how someone’s speaking to a family member or friend versus when they’re speaking with you. They might be more attentive in their speech style and desire to highlight their best qualities through their voice.
For example, if they’d like for you to believe they’re masculine, they might deepen their voice and if they want you to think they’re sweet, they might soften their voice.
7. Inward leaning
Jack Schafer, Ph.D. states that as rapport increases between two people, inward leaning may increase as well.
This happens gradually and will often include signs of belly button alignment and open body language. This might be easier to tell when involved in a one-on-one conversation than in a group. The best plan of action is to first notice if someone is making frequent eye contact with you. If you reciprocate, they begin to in their body towards you and inevitably lean in, especially if they’re seated. Take it as a positive sign that they are interested in or attracted to you.
On the other hand, those who aren’t interested in the topic at hand or seem confusingly indifferent to your impossibly good looks and charm might lean back and heat themselves at a distance instead.
Distracted Behavior
Maybe you’re noticing your crush seems more distracted in one on one study sessions with you than when in a group setting. Or perhaps you notice that an acquaintance you just met is completely unaware of their surroundings while in conversation with you.
It’s even possible that strangers who walk past you are distracted and do a double-take as you walk by. Someone’s attraction to you whether platonic or romantic might be obvious and they’ve subconsciously focused attention on you while seeming distracted from their previous focus of attention.
So as long as you’re not out there, causing traffic jams, or having people trip from rubbernecking to get another look at you, keep being your enticingly attractive self.
Have you noticed any of these signs? Let me know in the comments below.
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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.
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