Authenticity: The New 'Cool'

Starting in the 1930s, the word cool was an African American term for “approval for”. It is sourced from jazz music and culture. During the late 1940s, cool became a term for “intensely good”. That’s cool.

I was born in 1962. Growing up in the 1960s, the word cool was still used. I wasn’t born cool. No, not at all. Maybe, instead, I was the definition of uncool. Cool had also become neat. However, neat wasn’t as cool as cool. Just saying. In the 1970s, during the Vietnam era, groovy became the new cool. Yet, there was cool.

In the 1980s, when I was in high school and college, cool was resurrected. In the early 2000s, iconic Paris Hilton’s signature catchphrase was “That’s hot.” Cool was now hot. No, we’re not talking temperature. Ironically, both cool and hot really meant the same thing. Everybody wanted to be cool. Everyone wanted to be hot.

For Millennials, dope and fly were cool although, as a Boomer, I wasn’t cool enough to use either term without straining. Oh yeah, hot was still cool. I had a conversation with my Millennial friend Avery about John Wick 3. He said, “It was fire.” So, fire is the new hot, the new cool. Throughout all that, cool is still cool. Everyone still wants to be cool. Just saying.

In third grade, I got that I was so deathly not cool. I started wearing glasses. I was fat. Mom had to buy me husky pants from JC Penny’s. I was so not athletic. I didn’t play Little League Baseball like my cousins. I was a nerd. I got that I wasn’t good-looking, either. I was shorter than most kids. After eighth grade, I stopped growing entirely.

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At 14-years-old, I was the unattractive, short, fat geek. I was so uncool. I got that I was never going to date the pretty girl. So, I concentrated on my strengths. At least, I was smart. I forfeited any kind of social life. I studied hard. Got good grades.

Eventually, I went to college and studied Electrical Engineering. I got my bachelor’s and master’s degrees. I got a good job in Los Angeles working on satellites. Still, I wasn’t cool. In fact, I was a loser, a distinction sourced from getting that I was an utter disappointment to Dad. So not cool.

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At the MTV Movie Awards, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson accepted the MTV 2019 Generations Award. In 2019, The Rock was the Highest-Paid Actor on Planet Earth. No one had expected that from the Half-Black, Half-Samoan, 6’ 4, 275-pound World Heavyweight Wrestling Champion.

In his acceptance speech (see video below), Dwayne said, “The most powerful thing that we can be is ourselves.” When The Rock first arrived in Hollywood, they said, “You gotta be a certain way…” Instead, Dwayne said, “I wasn’t going to conform to Hollywood. Hollywood was going to conform to me…” Amen.

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I spent much of my life trying to be cool. Trying to be someone else.

Over 30 years ago, I began training in Aikido with the late Mizukami Sensei. Sensei said, “Just train.” It wasn’t like I had to get somewhere, prove something, or be someone else. Sensei created the space to work on the greater-than versions of myself. I was free to just be me. Finally, I was cool. No, I wasn’t stronger, smarter, or more handsome. I was as authentic as I could be. I was the best version of me.

In the bigger picture, cool is timeless, classic. It’s just cool. Like The Rock, I’ve discovered that the most powerful thing that I can be is my authentic self. To mine own self be true. In that bigger picture, cool isn’t about being with the pretty woman, having a lot of money, living in a big house. Cool is loving myself for who I am and forgiving myself for who I’m not.

The late Mizukami Sensei said, “Just train. It’s not like you have to get somewhere.” Cool is about what I have to do, what I have to give up, to be the best that I can be. That’s cool. Just saying.

Watch the MTV Movie Awards video here: