In a dismal 19 states in our Unites States of America, conversion therapy for the LGBT youth is banned. That leaves the majority of states to continue to use the misinformed and incredibly harmful practices of conversion therapy however they’d like and see fit. For those that are uninformed on the practice, conversion therapy is “aimed at changing an individual’s sexual orientation or gender identity. Conversion therapists use a variety of shaming, emotionally traumatic or physically painful stimuli to make their victims associate those stimuli with their LGBTQ identities.”
Conversion therapy does not work and is harmful. Not only are the side effects those that already plagued the gay community such as depression and anxiety, self-hatred and the possibility of self-destructive behavior, but the practice seems as archaic and medieval as building a wall on the border of the United States of America. This is still a huge problem in America, and many are unaware of it still, possibly through no fault of their own.
The irony in conversion therapy lies in those who have either enforced its use or have been put through it themselves. McKrae Game found the Hope for Wholeness Network which aims to use conversion therapy along with faith to cleanse people of their believed to be irreverent and wrong desires. Game spent 20 years doing that and just last month in September, he denounced his practice and its preaching by saying he felt ashamed by the choices he made.
It’s all in my past, but many, way TOO MANY continue believing that there is something wrong with themselves and wrong with people that choose to live their lives honestly and open as gay, lesbian, trans, etc. The very harmful cycle of self-shame and condemnation has to stop.
Game is not the only one to denounce their past though. Just a few years ago in 2014, “ex-gay” leaders signed a letter reaffirming that the practice is harmful and ineffective. They called for an end to it. Furthermore, a Latter-day Saint came out in January as gay and also renounced ex-gay ‘ministry’, or whatever they call it. Game acknowledged he hurt people and feels awful about the things he said, perhaps inspiring people to harm themselves because of his hurtful words. “Why would I want that to continue?” Game asked rhetorically.
Our climate, due in part to social media and perhaps the impatient nature of ourselves to see a change in the world and others, has coined the term ‘cancel culture’. But in the case of Game as well as many others, there is forgiveness and retribution to be had. Those who are apologetic for their past actions and seek to somehow redeem themselves and help the communities they so shamefully harmed in the past, do exist.
Ironically, they too experience what so many of the LGBTQ+ community experience, the loss of friends and family as well as the support of the communities they live in. That kind of irony does not go unseen and perhaps it speaks to the nature of us as human beings to be so rigid and uptight regarding other people’s decisions. Game has been on the receiving end of anger from both the communities he once was so against as well as those he worked with.
The example that Game and so many others have set, both the negative and positive, is what makes their stories so relatable. WE can all change our minds and hope for a better tomorrow. We should see a sign and beacon of hope illuminating the better nature in each of us because of those like Game who has been enlightened on matters they were once so ignorant or cruel natured toward.
We live in a time as a country in which it feels as though any minute the sound of a pin dropping could propel us all to explode or implode. We are hot, heated, heavy and fuming out the ears as far as politics and the attacks that so many make on simple human rights go. The anger and hurt are justified and it will always be justified, but the ability for human beings to change and see the light of day in terms of our wrongdoings should be held onto with great hope.
It might be the only thing we have at this point.
—
