My friend John, when he was in his 90s, said to me one day:
“Fred … don’t worry about old age — it won’t last!”
John was a real stoic. Only two weeks before saying that, he’d also asked me if I had put my name into a ten-year time capsule that our group was setting up a week previously. And when I said that I had, he told me that he had too, adding: “That means that we’ll be here in ten years time to open it!”
Isn’t he great? Good old John!
Anyone who saw John, saw him as as ‘alive’ & ‘alert’
John: … an example of an ‘oldie’ who never let his age bother him, and those who met him saw him as alive and real.
The sad thing is that many people (especially the younger ones) have a different view of oldies in general. They treat them dismissively (if they notice them at all) … they seem to be invisible.
Old people are often treated as INVISIBLE by younger folk
It’s so sad … but sadly, true!
It’s as if there’s an automatic refusal to see them as real folk … These people who, despite their age, have qualities and ‘gifts-of-life and living’ that are uniquely theirs, and there for all to see … if only ‘eyes would see’.
…
Many older people do lead active lives:
Take ‘Me’ for instance … I’m 83 and living in an over-50s resort. But here, over-50s tend to become ‘over-60s’, then ‘over 70s’, and … like me, ‘over 80s’.
And in truth, there does seem to be a noticeable number of mobility scooters, walking sticks and wheel chairs around our village!
However, I must say that looking around me at this resort community of distinct oldies, they do seem to get up to all sorts of activities that would challenge many younger ones. Here’s what goes on in our ‘village’ on a regular basis:
- Gym Classes
- Aqua Classes and individual visits to the Pool
- Walking & Walking Aerobics
- Line Dancing
- Rock ’n’ Roll Nights
- Music Sessions, playing guitar and ukulele:
- Lawn Bowls & Carpet Bowls
- Table-Tennis & Tennis
- Golf
What a list of activities hey? … though there are also more sedate activities like Card-Playing & Mah-jong; Gentle Yoga; Tai Chi; Knitting & Sewing; Art & Craft; and Snooker & Pool, and of course: Bingo!
Plus leisurely dinners and BBQs (with a drink or two … or three!)
Some of these oldies can knock ’em back!
But ‘each to his own’ of course, and please don’t get a picture of everyone here ‘rocking it’ every night. I myself for instance did attend the Hawaiian night, plus Rock ’n’ Roll Video Dance nights, but apart from the dinners, I look quite anti-social when compared to the others here.
I say: “Each to their own”, and for me, walking, private gym sessions, and gardening is all I do … but that’s just me.
Oh yes, I forgot to say … I write a bit too!
As I say: “Each to their own”.
But I think you get the picture: “Oldies are certainly not invisible!”
* * * * * OLDIES Are Certainly NOT INVISIBLE * * * * *
…
Takeaway: … A challenge that might ‘make someone’s day’.
I offer you ‘a challenge as your ‘takeaway’ for this article, Here it is:
Whatever your personal opinion and attitude towards older people, my challenge is simple, (though it may be harder than it first seems):
THE CHALLENGE:
Each day, when you go out and find yourself amongst strangers (as in say a visit to the shops, or a walk to a cafe for lunch, or just ‘out’ somewhere) … look out for older people and pick somehow that ‘catches your eye’ (maybe because they look interesting, or they seem to be struggling, or maybe they just look happy … anything really) … it’s your decision as to who you pick.
Now, (as sensitively and as ‘natural’ as you can muster), think of something to ‘say’ to that person.
Not anything that may frighten, disturb, or upset them … just something that seems appropriate like:
“You look happy today”, or “Hello … I’ve seen you around here before, so thought I’d introduce myself … I’m ‘XXX’ “, or “Hi, it’s a lovely day (or a terrible day) today isn’t it?”, or something else that you can come up with.
You’ll be surprised how many of these ‘unknown to you’ older people light up just by hearing an interested voice.
Don’t dismiss this as silly nonsense … it works … and, you might be a beneficiary too. You’ll never know if you never try.
Give it a go … try it and see what reaction you get.
I believe that your thoughtfulness will prove worthwhile.
YOU’LL MAKE SOMEONE’S DAY
…
Will you try?
As with all good ideas, it is easy to think about doing it, or say: “Maybe tomorrow … Maybe not … Maybe I’ll think about it”
DO IT NOW; NOT TOMORROW; NOT NEXT WEEK … NOW!
YOU CAN MAKE SOMEONE’S DAY TODAY … YOU CAN !
* * * ‘GO ON’ … MAKE AN ‘OLDIE’ HAPPY TODAY * * *
******************************************
‘Getting Old Ain’t Always Easy’ by Fred: writer on Medium
******** © Fred Ogden 2024 ********
* * * (Feel free to share it on social media if that’s your scene) * * *
You can also Clap & Comment (via icons at top or bottom of this article)
******************************************
NAVIGATION PANEL: TO EVERYTHING FRED: (clickable links)
- All You Need to Know About Fred (including an Index to Fred’s Stories)
- New Index to ALL Fred’s Story Collections
- Get Fred’s new stories delivered to your email inbox … There’s no charge
- Fred’s Email: [email protected]
******************************************
- Follow Fred on Medium: 👉 Fred’s Follow-button (top of all his stories), and he’ll click YOUR ‘follow’ button if he finds your stories appealing.
Still not yet a Medium member? … Why not Join? (For just the price of a cup of coffee a month!) … Now that’s value!
******************************************
—
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
From The Good Men Project on Medium
What Does Being in Love and Loving Someone Really Mean? | My 9-Year-Old Accidentally Explained Why His Mom Divorced Me | The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex | The Internal Struggle Men Battle in Silence |
***
Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.
Register New Account
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—–
Photo credit: VARIOUS ‘OLD-TIMER’ CLIPS SENT TO ME BY SOME OF MY OLDIE FRIENDS (attributions attached)