Healing Trauma Is All the Hype, but What Does It Mean?

In the last few years, the topic of healing trauma took social media by storm, also thanks to people like Dr Nicole LePera (The Holistic Psychologist )that share that change is possible.

There are now a whopping 5.4 million people following her page, and she started the #SelfHealers movement. A group dedicated to people that want to do the work.

She also has a book called “How To Do The Work” — which I do recommend you take a peek at.

Whether you are part of it or not, we’re now riding a wave of change, both external and internal.

This generation seems committed to breaking the cycle and transforming years of stored trauma. Starting a collective movement that stems from an individual will to change themselves for the better. To grow, heal and as a consequence, make the world a better place.

All in all, it sounds incredibly lovely. But let’s remove our rosy glasses for a sec. Healing is damn hard.

What Is Healing?

If you are reading this, you might have heard the term and seen the posts but you might not know what it actually means.

In essence, It’s the ability to live in the present without being overwhelmed by the thoughts and feelings of the past. It means to be in charge of your life again.

Healing means putting yourself first. It means constantly showing up for yourself. No matter what.

If you ask me, working on breaking my cycle is probably the hardest thing I have ever done — and still doing it on a daily basis.

Harder than starting my life in a new country, harder than apologising for my mistakes, and harder than leaving someone I loved cause they weren’t good for me.

It is hard because the process of getting rid of automatic unhelpful thoughts and feelings is uncomfortable. You are learning to trust yourself and before you do that, you need to become aware of what is not working.

What is not serving you anymore needs to go. And there is where the difficult, uncomfortable work starts.

Rewiring and reframing thoughts that have been a certain way for years takes time and patience.

Meeting The Real You

Working on yourself means introducing yourself to yourself.

All the coping mechanisms you’ve learned to protect yourself from trauma, the ones that helped you along the way, are also hiding your persona.

You will discover and bring to the surface your needs, your wants, the things you didn’t know you loved and some of the things you dislike about yourself and others.

You’ll learn to change what is not working and accept what you cannot change.

The aim of all this healing is so you can stand on your own two feet, be enough as you are and ultimately love yourself again — or for the first time.

You’ll Be Ready To Dance Alone

One of the most wonderful gifts you can give yourself is feeling whole on your own.

Imagine not depending on anyone for your happiness. Because that’s what we do when we enter a relationship for example and expect the other person to make us happy. We expect them to be there no matter what and when they leave we feel empty and abandoned.

When you put someone else in charge of your feelings, remember they also have the power to make you miserable.

The real gift is to be ok no matter what. You are there for yourself and you can dance on your own.

Is Healing For Everyone?

If you find yourself in unhappy situations or repeated patterns, maybe it’s time to stop and see what needs to change.

So in a way, yes, healing should be done by everyone. I would definitely recommend looking inward now and then.

Can you see your shadow? Is there work to do? Then don’t delay it, start now. Read, journal, get to know yourself and become aware of why you do what you do.

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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.

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