YES I’m a survivor of severe childhood abuse and I live with a severe stammer . I wasn’t just sexually abused I was drowned beaten raped , humiliated groomed and had to stab my male man at 16 after 4 years of sexual abuse . I couldn’t go home to my family as I was being severely abused at home , I did find the courage to disclose in later life but was treated as a liar and was persecuted for it . I am now 46 and receiving the right help and support from my local mental health team… Read more »
Why don’t some guys come forward? Fear is a big part of it. We here about gangs and gang violence but one of the best kept secrets is male rape in gangs. I had a client who was speaking at a HS school about addictions and was talking about his gang affiliation when he stopped in his tracks and left the class room. I went out to speak with him … This so called hard ass gang member was in tears. While talking about his gang affiliation, it all came out in his head … he been raped by gang… Read more »
Guest
Tom Brechlin
8 years ago
I like this but disagree with the idea that it can’t influence a child’s sexual orientation. And I think it’s dangerous to flat out say it can’t. There is a lot of complexity to male on male abuse while in the developmental years. The key word is “developmental” years.
Tom, I believe you are conflating the idea of sexual orientation and sexual behavior. A person can engage in acts with partners across the gender spectrum, and can also experiment with their own gender identity and sexual identity for many different reasons. Experience of abuse can absolutely influence the way a person sees their own sexual identity, however it is important for survivors to understand that being abused does not ultimately change the truth of who they are sexually. I like to say that being sexually abused can have the impact of robbing one of a sense of ownership of… Read more »
YES I’m a survivor of severe childhood abuse and I live with a severe stammer . I wasn’t just sexually abused I was drowned beaten raped , humiliated groomed and had to stab my male man at 16 after 4 years of sexual abuse . I couldn’t go home to my family as I was being severely abused at home , I did find the courage to disclose in later life but was treated as a liar and was persecuted for it . I am now 46 and receiving the right help and support from my local mental health team… Read more »
My heat goes out to you Jonathan. Hang in there.
Why don’t some guys come forward? Fear is a big part of it. We here about gangs and gang violence but one of the best kept secrets is male rape in gangs. I had a client who was speaking at a HS school about addictions and was talking about his gang affiliation when he stopped in his tracks and left the class room. I went out to speak with him … This so called hard ass gang member was in tears. While talking about his gang affiliation, it all came out in his head … he been raped by gang… Read more »
I like this but disagree with the idea that it can’t influence a child’s sexual orientation. And I think it’s dangerous to flat out say it can’t. There is a lot of complexity to male on male abuse while in the developmental years. The key word is “developmental” years.
Tom, I believe you are conflating the idea of sexual orientation and sexual behavior. A person can engage in acts with partners across the gender spectrum, and can also experiment with their own gender identity and sexual identity for many different reasons. Experience of abuse can absolutely influence the way a person sees their own sexual identity, however it is important for survivors to understand that being abused does not ultimately change the truth of who they are sexually. I like to say that being sexually abused can have the impact of robbing one of a sense of ownership of… Read more »
Christopher, Thank you for your explanation that does bring some clarity.