He Lost His Job. He’s A Dreamer. He’s Driving His Wife Crazy (aka She’s Scared)… Intimacy Expert Allana Pratt Says It’s About Trust…
Question: My husband is a dreamer. It is something I have always admired but his current (well now former) job kept him grounded. Unfortunately, they are downsizing and he has been laid off. Now his imagination is running wild and each week he wants to do something new/different and keeps talking about moving to pursue his dreams. I would be more supportive if I could trust that he was actually committed and wasn’t going to change his mind next week. Any help?
Answer: After almost two decades of coaching, I have begun to see/sense energy as a way to explain where people’s blocks are… like a 6th sense of what’s going on seen through the eyes of non judgment and tender curiosity.
I can also see/sense if a person is more ‘out there’ or ‘on the planet’. Neither is better, yet a balance of both creates results, magic and ease.
It seems your husband’s dreamer way of being makes his energy more ‘out there’ and he requires grounded structure (a job) to balance out his gifts. It seems you not only lack trust when he changes his mind all the time, you get scared, yes?
When we dive under the initial reaction to something (fear) and get connected to the pure desire/need, we can communicate without judgment to our beloved.
“Sweetheart, I love how creative you are. It’s like you’re tapped into limitless creativity. And given it’s limitless, it’s like a new idea comes each week. Babe, this makes me feel scared, like a tree with many blossoms that want to be turned into fruit, yet there aren’t any roots to feed the tree. What would make me happy is if you could get more grounded in your thoughts, decisions, energy so we could turn an idea from a blossom into fruit. This would make me feel safe, held, supported and able to champion your dream.”
“What would it take for you to feel certain and clear in choosing one path that I could support you with, that would be fabulous for our life, our family, our future? If you’re not sure how to find that clarity, if perhaps a mentor could partner with you to find that grounded certainty, I’m all for you exploring that. I don’t want to be your mentor or mother, I love being your lover! It turns me on when you have certainty, follow through and direction. Perhaps you could connect with a wonderful coach/healer Allana Pratt and see if she’s a fit to support you right now. I sense this layoff could actually be the biggest gift to you and our future ever. I love you and believe in you. And thank you for talking with her so I can feel safe and trust you and champion your dream.”
Now, that’s “Allana speak” so use your own vernacular, yet basically it’s a time for you to guide him to his next level of evolution. Sometimes it will be his turn to guide you. Relationships are a dance to support one another’s growth. The trick is to do so with non judgment while staying heart connected.
I look forward to supporting your fabulous dreamer in channeling his dreams into reality, being grounded on the planet able to follow through to get results, so that you’ll feel safe, able to trust him and perhaps make your marriage thrive more than it ever has before… that only gets better 😉 Email my [email protected] Subj: GMP Sent Me (the dreamer) and let’s set up a strategy session to see if he’s a fit to work with me.
In the mean time, for him, my complementary report for men called www.GetHerToSayYes.com helps stop the spinning and gets men into their heart, wisdom, clarity and power… and for you, perhaps you’d enjoy my book about true feminine power and being the invitation to bring out the noble badass in your man. www.HowToBeAndStaySexy.com being exactly who you are.
Thank you for your question, I sense this is the tipping point of a whole new dimension of connection, success and joy for you both. Blessings, deliciously, Allana xoox