With the technological advances in the world today, people are finally capable of loving one another from different corners of the planet. But what is it like to be in a virtual relationship? Can a virtual relationship even function properly? What does it take to make a virtual relationship work?
We will answer that question in this article so make sure to stick around to find out the truth about virtual love.
Proof Of Ancient ‘Virtual’ Love
Okay, so, love, is a concept that knows no boundaries.
Besides the psychological and biological effect that this feeling has on us, Love in itself is limitless. It can stretch and it shrinks, it can run and it can chase, it can shift from one side to the other… and it can be cherished by all of us as something that gives life meaning.
It is true that for ages love has been felt by people who were no closer to each other than hundreds and sometimes even thousands of miles.
We can go way back into antiquity and analyze how love is the one force that has even decided the fate of whole nations.
I mean, we have all seen the Greece movie how one guy from one country, took the wife of another guy from another country because they fell in love when they saw each other for the first time.
And in the end, love prevailed, because Greece won. Well, the guy died and the woman became a widow for life, but at least love won the war.
We can go on forever with examples of how real love has always drawn people that are far away from each other.
Is Virtual Love Even Possible?
Does this resonate with you? Are you a girl or a guy who has been talking to someone from the other side of the world and you are slowly catching feelings?
Well, we are here to give you the answer.
And yes… it is possible to love someone virtually.
You see, love is not much about the physical touch, as it is about the soul connection. And I have seen people fall deeply in love by just texting on Facebook.
No video calls. Maybe a couple of phone calls. But the majority of that relationship was solely texting. And I said ‘was’ because it sadly ended but that doesn’t mean that a virtual relationship is doomed to fail.
I know what you’re thinking right now.
Does A Virtual Relationship Work?
Yes, it does. Despite the overwhelming stigma surrounding it, building and maintaining a serious online relationship is possible and proven.
There are many limits, so this is why having this kind of relationship is more complicated and challenging than a normal one.
But let’s dive deeper together and see how a virtual relationship works and…
What Is It Like To Be In A Virtual Relationship?
Okay, so for this case I’m going to use that same true Facebook love story that I mentioned earlier. We are going to see how the relationship started, what didn’t work out, and what could’ve worked better.
Better get ready because we are about to dive into a real rollercoaster of a 1 and half year virtual relationship that happened solely from Facebook.
Alright, here we go.
Now, I have a cousin whose name is… let’s call him Dan. Okay, so Dan, used to have a huge crush in high school. His crush, let’s call her Lisa was in the same class as Dan.
They used to study Finance together, but Dan never had the guts to actually talk to her. He would always peak around the corner and then go into hiding whenever she would notice him looking.
How Did The Relationship Start?
Fast-forward to summer after senior year and Dan finally decided he had enough. Well, the truth is that he stumbled across Lisa’s Facebook profile one day.
Since school was over, they were probably never going to meet again, Facebook was safer than physical interaction since she couldn’t see him blushing, and all the odds seemed in his introverted favor, Dan went for it.
The next day, Lisa replied. This made Dan the happiest man on Earth. Maybe not the happiest, but it did make his butterflies go nuts inside his stomach.
Lisa seemed friendly to him. She was open to talking, didn’t brush him off, didn’t judge him, and would actually reply with messages longer than two words. So they started hitting it off and one week later, boom, the first heart emojis started being exchanged.
Well, to be completely honest, Dan was the first one to pull the trigger, believe it or not. One night after just five days of talking for a medium of one hour per day on Facebook, Dan was having so much fun that when Lisa said it’s time for bed, Dan just went for it and texted her: “Good night… princess (heart emoji)”
Lisa replied with a blushy face but it took only a couple of days for her to open up and start sending kissy faces and all.
Everything seemed perfectly normal, until…
…one day Lisa made a shocking announcement. She sent Dan a crying face saying that she had just received some news that was just horrible for both of them. I forgot to mention, they had been talking for three months to this point, but the L-word hadn’t been brought up yet.
In Lisa’s eyes, Dan was different. He was always so nice to her. He would never complain about the fact that they had never met. Her virtual presence was enough. And he was still nice to her when she dropped the bomb…
Lisa had been accepted to college and Dan thought that was awesome. Little did he know this was a travel and study scholarship, in Europe that would last at least a year.
Dan was at first struck but then he started saying how this was a great thing for her future.
What Lisa did next was a real shocker to Dan. If she went to the scholarship, that meant that they wouldn’t meet for more than a year. And she didn’t want that because she loved Dan.
Those three months had gone by so fast that it felt like they had just started talking, but for his high-school crush to say that she loves him, first. Man o man was Dan fired up.
He started jumping up and down from excitement so much that he almost forgot to say it back.
What Didn’t Work Out?
However, there was one dark thing that Dan wasn’t aware of.
Lisa was looking for more than just a virtual relationship. But Dan never thought of that. Her spiritual presence was enough for him. Just a ‘Hi’ text from her was enough.
Lisa had different priorities. You see, her parents taught her to find a man who’s going to be there for her. Not just from the other side of the screen. There… to physically and emotionally comfort her.
Fast forward another six months, and the texting routine was still on.
Yet, now Lisa had to study and Dan had to work and study so they wouldn’t talk as much. Phone calls were out of the question since neither of them could afford the expensive phone bill.
However, they would make time to talk to each other each and every single day. And every night Dan would text: “Good night, princess (heart emoji)”.
It was a solid relationship if you ask me, but after that first year, came the first rip into their virtual love.
You see, the thing about virtual relationships is that both partners have to be sure of what they want. Dan didn’t mind distance at all. He only wanted love. Lisa wanted something more, which could not happen in the near future.
That’s why the first time that she went out to a college party in France, she had a bit too much to drink… and… as you can guess… she kissed another guy.
Dan was shattered when he found out. However, he forgave her with the hopes that in a few months they would meet and their bond would get stronger after that. But they both started slipping from the rope and their Facebook messages were now filled with long break-up paragraphs, until they eventually, blocked each other.
What Could’ve Worked Better?
What did they do wrong? First of all, neither of them communicated what they actually wanted in life. Different people are satisfied with different things and though a virtual relationship can be thrilling, both of you have to make sure that this is more than enough for you.
To make a virtual relationship work, talking is not enough. It takes pure openness and honesty not only with each other with yourselves. You must be willing to either have an open relationship where both of you satisfy your physical needs with other people yet love only one another.
Or you have to decide to refrain from any physical interaction and dedicate only to one partner… across the world.
Final Thoughts
Being in a virtual relationship is more than possible and a lot of people nowadays are dating someone that’s across the ocean from them. However, for a virtual relationship to work out there are two things to consider:
- Open communication is key. Both of you must freely express what you want in life, even in the long term. How do you envision marriage? Is there a possible scenario in your mind where you guys can meet and finally live together? Are you satisfied with only their presence? Ask questions and give back honest and open answers about what you want.
- Dedicating to only one person. You either have an open relationship and can satisfy your physical needs elsewhere while still loving that one person. Or you can decide to refrain from any of that and patiently wait for the day when you guys meet up. Whatever your choice, pure honesty is needed. If you feel an urge, let your virtual partner know your feelings and how both of you can deal with them.
I hope you really got some value out of this article and if you are in a situation where you love someone who’s entire miles away from you, keep your head up.
It can still work out if you guys truly love each other.
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This post was previously published on Hello, Love.
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