I spent years complaining. It never served a purpose. I resist the urge to do it anymore. Honestly, I’m not among the ‘think positive’ people. I’m usually fine with the way life works. I fix things when they turn bad. But there comes a time when I think of being a…well…a less negative person.
It’s been years since I was a complainer. Everyone does it, right? I complained about small and big issues. I blamed the internet provider when speeds were slow. I thought the guy driving ahead of me was a moron when he didn’t avoid potholes on the road. I complained about water temperature and quality of soap before bathing.
I thought that none of what I was doing was affecting me. It felt good to release the frustration once in a while—a fine, crazy shortcut. The negativity added up. Slowly, I developed a “This sucks. That sucks. Everything sucks,” kind of attitude. My head felt heavy and eyebrows showed anger. My heart felt frustrated. Ultimately, I got tired. It felt bad, very bad.
First, I couldn’t grasp what was making me restless, but then I had to deal with the consequences that the common habit of complaining and blaming. I sat peacefully and asked myself “What’s wrong?” Then I got my answers. I learned how complaining was making my life bitter.
I’m not some special case. Complaining affects all of us equally. It does something to us. And that ‘something’ isn’t good. The following points would make it clear for you.
Complaining makes us a weak, helpless nagger.
1. You become badly dissatisfied.
Life becomes uninteresting. Nothing pleases you and you start to lose meaning. Each time you complain, you show your disregard for the existing belongings in your life. Suddenly, your car isn’t comfortable, phone isn’t cool enough, and your family doesn’t seem to be understanding—however, in reality, nothing has changed except your outlook.
2. You resemble a victim.
You accept that you’re helpless the moment you utter a complaint. You don’t complain when you know you can fix things, right? But when you do complain, then it’s a sure sign that you’ve given up hope. You aren’t prepared to mend your life.
You simply accept that you’re a victim and prefer to nag and whine like one instead of taking control. You get used to asking for sympathy instead of doing something to escape the hell you’re trapped in.
3. You lose control over life.
Most of the time, you can bounce back. Bad things in life aren’t permanent.
However, if you choose to blame and complain about mending your losses, you find yourself incapable of handling situations. Even when you’re willing to do something to repair your circumstances and have the power to do so, complaining holds you back.
4. You wrongly assume you’re entitled.
You live with an assumption that things “should” occur in a certain way. Then, when you’re challenged by uncertainties, you lose your senses. You become incapable of deciding what you should do next and end up in muddiness. Complaining teaches you all sorts of wrong lessons. Feeling entitled to a “perfect life” is one of them.
5. You stop being grateful.
Nothing seems right. Instead of ignoring tiny imperfections and compromising, you begin noticing everything you lack. Life seems like a burden rather than a blessing. As you complain incessantly, you notice everything you don’t have instead of being thankful for whatever you own.
6. You become anxious.
Complaining hides some truths. It prevents you from realizing if you’re being irresponsible, hiding problems, or are making excuses. When your false complaints are snatched from you, you’re exposed to the side you don’t want to admit you have. That’s when you discover you should’ve prepared yourself for the unforeseen future by growing up.
7. Your life seems painful.
Though life may be just normal, you start seeing your own life as a miserable thing as you complain more and more about it. It hurts you to see all that’s going wrong.
You look at others and they seem to be doing fine, but not you. You were so busy complaining that you gathered a heap of pains over time. Now, it hurts to see how you wasted your precious time.
8. You become weaker.
Keeping your mouth shut and contemplating can help you recognize and resolve your problems—but complaining doesn’t.
Complaining means nothing more than blabbering mindlessly about a bunch of things occasionally go wrong.
In the end, you need to admit that you’ve been doing it as you didn’t have the courage to admit and mend your problems.
You make life easier for yourself when you stop complaining.
The moment you stop complaining, you also stop being irresponsible and weak. You become capable of enduring pains, taking little blows from life, and getting up every time you’re forced to fall. Most of the time, the courage you have is enough. Enough to live a good life.
What’s your take on what you just read? Comment below or write a response and submit to us your own point of view or reaction here at the red box, below, which links to our submissions portal.
Are you a first-time contributor to The Good Men Project? Submit here:
Have you contributed before and have a Submittable account? Use our Quick Submit link here:
Do you have previously published work that you would like to syndicate on The Good Men Project? Click here:
Got Writer’s Block?
We are a participatory media company. Join us.
Participate with the rest of the world, with the things your write and the things you say, and help co-create the world you want to live in.
If you believe in the work we are doing here at The Good Men Project, please join us as a Premium Member, today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
Photo credit: Getty Images