I co-founded the Good Men Project in 2009. And BOY has it grown. Amazing. I had absolutely nothing to do with it. Lisa Hickey has done an amazing job as CEO creating remarkable content that truly is changing the world and how we all view manhood. My role has been purely behind the scenes for a long time now just cheering Lisa, and her whole team, on. Thank you with all my heart to all of you who have built such a vibrant community.
The most significant thing that has happened to me in the last 13 years is a mental health crisis the spring of 2018 that nearly killed me. Richard Ruhr saying that spiritual growth is based on love and suffering. And under all love is an element of suffering. And I think he is right. My crisis, as much as it was excruciating, created a space for radical change in my life. In the time since, I have grown much closer to the man I was intended to be, and to my own personal conception of God. I am happier today than I have ever been in my 58 years. An extreme introvert my entire life, I went into myself and came out the other side and find myself an extrovert who wants so much to build deep and meaningful connections with those around me. I have realized that for me the answer is always service, particularly to men. When I help a man who is suffering find hope, my heart is filled in a way that no business transaction every satisfied me.
In the 5 years since my brush with suicide, nothing on the outside has changed. I am married to the same woman. I have the same three kids. I have the same Golden retriever, Cooper, who I adore. As I write this, I am sitting at the same desk I was five years ago and in the same chair.
But my soul has been radically changed and set free.
Recently, I have been messing around with a project that I am super excited about. I hope you will join me.
The concept is this. A speaker series for men who are interested in hearing about and talking about spirituality, meaning, and manhood. We invite great speakers who speak on zoom for 30 minutes and then the audience has a chance to share their reactions and experiences for 30 minutes. One hour on Sunday nights from 8-9 EST. We have been at it for a couple months now tweaking the format and are now ready to invite you in. Our hope is to play just a tiny part in the journey of as many men as possible. There is something about the live interaction on zoom that is magical. We heard amazing speakers and then get a chance to stand in our own truth.
This week we have Adrian Walker, the noted Boston Globe columnist. Future speakers include a NYT war photographer talking about goodness amidst tragedy, a Quaker who was a leader during the Summer of 1964, a father who lost one son to addiction and has another in his mid 40s who can’t get off Meth, a recovering gambling addict, the father and solo parent of a deaf blind who sees God in the eyes of his daughter, a grandfather who just lost his grandson in a freak car accident and how his spirituality helped him deal with the overwhelming grief, a devout catholic physician in Puerto Rico who continues to try to save the lives of his patients despite power outages and hurricanes. Much more to come…including female speakers since I really believe we as men are going to need to listen to women talk about their experience much, much more if we are ever going to get anywhere.
The best way to get involved is to join our Facebook group here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1361992037943173
I hope the women in the GMP community will understand that we are trying to create a safe space for men to be inspired and open themselves up in ways that might not happen if women were present or be triggering to those women. This is truly to help men who are seekers move along the path to greater discovery ultimately to the benefit of the women in their lives.
If you have an idea for a great speaker feel free to share it with me on [email protected]
Big love
Namaste
Tom
This is a welcoming and inclusive group for those who identify as male of all races, ethnicity, sexual orientation, nationality, age or belief who are seeking a more meaningful life.
All speakers will address some aspect of living a life based on spiritual principals. All participants are welcome—sober addicts, active addicts, non-addicts, searchers of any variety or simply men interested in hearing the week’s speaker.
We would ask you to adhere to AA’s principal of anonymity.
What you hear here and who you see here please let it stay here.
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Photo: iStock