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I had gotten so bad I was beginning to ruin some shoes. I had developed the habit of not tying and untying them. I found it easy to slip out of tied shoes. Getting back into them was more difficult.
In thinking about this subject, I got some stressful flash backs from kindergarten. I had a very nurturing up bringing. This, however, did not include being taught how to tie my shoes at an age where most of the other children in school knew how. The teacher was quick to remind me of this and to remind me that her days of doing this for me were limited. She had a talk with my parents.
I did not poke other children, say bad words, wet my pants, or complain about nap time. I thought I was doing pretty good in school but feared expulsion over this shoe tying thing. The teacher kept trying to teach me, as did my parents. I just didn’t get it. I turned to my best friend Bill. He was in the first grade. I figured not only could he do it, he was old enough to be able to teach me. He demonstrated a technique that involved visualizing two bunny ears made of looped shoe string. This conceptual break through lead to success. At first, the ties didn’t hold for very long, but with practice came near perfection. Shoe tying became the most complicated thing I could do without thinking about it. This would continue until shoe lace tying was replaced with being able to drive a car.
Growing up, slip on shoes were never very popular. One of the names for them were “loafers.” While I secretly yearned to be lazy and avoid the need for shoe tying, I did not want to give evidence that I was a loafer.
When I was in college, I was introduced to cowboy boots. Having been raised in the Northeastern United States, I considered cowboy boots to be the exclusive foot wear of cowboys. Since I didn’t need to attach spurs to anything and didn’t have horse manure to wade through, I never imagined I would one day wear cowboy boots.
I was surprised to feel how comfortable cowboy boots were. It was fun being a little bit taller. The problem was I had feet that tended to sweat. This generated some complaints as to the odor that was released when I took off my boots.
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I found when it was almost time for my first child to go to school, I was a poor instructor as to how to tie shoes. I remembered about the bunny ears. My son found the thought of twisting a poor rabbit’s ears into a knot, not to his liking.
He was still struggling with shoe tying when along came Velcro. Velcro is one of the greatest technologies introduced in my lifetime. I was fascinated by the story of Velcro being invented. I followed the close observation of the little hooks on a burdock burr mating so snuggly with fabric loops. I had been pulling off burdock burrs for years, never imagining that a closer look could have made me a fortune.
When first patented, Velcro was expensive. Replacing shoe strings became its most marketable application. My second child met Velcro long before he was introduced to bunny ears.
Velcro never really caught on with adult shoes. I think this had something to do with the lazy image again, at least it was like that with me.
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I used to like to run as a hobby. Running involves stretching muscles before and after. I got quite limber. I could keep my knees locked and touch the ground with flat palms and then bend my elbows for an extra measure of flexibility. These days, I’m doing good when I can get finger tips to toes.
Not only that, but my balance is a little off when I bend over. Tying shoes is back to being an everyday exercise in concentration. I nearly always slipped out of tied shoes,when I was done walking around in them. I developed the habit of trying to squeeze into them when it was time to go again. I did this when I was in a hurry and when I wasn’t. I found it more difficult to do so when I was in a hurry. I had regressed to my preschool state. The backs of my right shoes kept getting crunched. I guess my right foot has been bigger than my left since birth. I just never paid much attention to it.
I got a pair of elastic shoe laces. I knew about them from my experience as a social worker when I was counseling individuals with physical disabilities. I knew about shoe horns with a long handle for slipping big feet into shoes. I thought I would start with the laces. I encountered too much of a need to bend over.
I decided to go with mindfulness meditation when tying and untying my shoes. I had been finding the mindfulness meditation was good for many of the hassles of getting old. It would have been great for many of the hassles of being younger too. Mindfulness meditation is many things. One of these things is focusing on doing whatever you are doing, even if you are used to not doing so.
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We do so many things on automatic pilot. Actually we tend to do most things like that. Pay attention to how frequently you are on autopilot while you are doing something, your attention is focused somewhere else. You may be amazed. This can be particularly true with everyday simple things you need to do, tasks you consider to be a hassle, such as putting on your shoes.
Mindfulness shoe tying has helped make me more flexible, has improved my balance, and now I look forward to tying my shoes. Okay that last thing is a lie. I’m not quite there yet, but I am enjoying writing this post about tying my shoes.
Women are often the ones to have big shoe collections, but men often have a affection for them as well. Thinking about lacing up running shoes, hiking shoes, combat boots, tack shoes, baseball cleats, boxing shoes, tennis shoes, etc, can get a man’s heart pounding. Thinking about being so infirm from age that you need to concentrate to put on a pair, not as exciting, but it doesn’t need to be sad.
I am sure the elastic laces and long handled shoe horns would have made me weaker and accelerated the need for such things.
Tying on shoes has been good for my soul too. With mindfulness comes a deeper appreciation of being aware enough to do anything and a greater appreciation of being awake.
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Photo Credit: Getty Images