Inspired by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s groundbreaking words, Lynn Wicker shares what dads can do to help their children realize their own dreams.
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This week in the United States, we remembered the tremendous contributions to the civil rights movement by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Dr. King’s legacy is that of minister, non-violent activist, humanitarian and leader.
He is probably most famously associated with his “I Have a Dream” speech, delivered in 1963 at the historic March on Washington at the Lincoln Memorial. Dr. King’s words in this relatively short speech have been recited thousands of times over the years.
I’m always so incredibly impacted by the words of his speech. They are so simplistic, yet so powerful and packed with imagery and deep meaning.
But there’s something very important about that speech that you may not know.
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The co-author of the “I Have a Dream” speech, Clarence Jones, shared with a news panel in 2013 that the most famous part of the speech came spontaneously.
As Dr. King was reading from the text of his prepared speech, Mahalia Jackson, a well-known gospel singer who was sitting on the platform, said, “Tell them about the dream, Martin! Tell them about the dream.”
Jones speculated that Mahalia Jackson, as Dr. King’s favorite gospel singer, had heard him in previous speeches talk about his dream in great detail.
He recalls he was standing about 50 feet behind Dr. King during the famous speech, listening and watching all of this unfold right before his eyes.
He noticed that upon the call of Mahalia Jackson, Dr. King moved his notes over to the left side of the podium. Jones recalled Dr. King’s body language shifted, where he had started reading from his speech as if intent on giving a lecture, he then went into preacher mode.
Clarence Jones later said, “I have never seen him speak the way I saw him on that day. It was as if some cosmic transcendental force came down and occupied his body. It was the same body, the same voice; but the voice had something I had never heard before.”
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Dr. King had a dream.
he shared his dream from deep within his being and it was something so personal and yet so public.
His physical stance, his voice tone and the discarding of his prepared notes demonstrated the power of his dream and he communicated it with passion and eloquence.
It’s obvious that Dr. King didn’t have any trouble identifying his dream. The injustices of the times demanded a response and he was willing to embrace a nobler dream and share it with the world.
I’m so glad Dr. King had a dream and that he did not let the hurts, disappointments and discouragement of others stifle that dream.
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Leadership author John Maxwell describes a dream:
“An inspiring picture of the future that energizes your mind, will and emotions, empowering you to do everything you can to achieve it. A genuine dream is a picture and blueprint of a person’s purpose and potential.”
Given that definition of a dream, it might be tempting to believe that everyone has their own dream and each person can easily identify it.
But as a life coach, my experience is that many adults have a great deal of difficulty identifying their dream.
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If you are a dad, then you’ve probably heard your kids talking about what they plan to do or be “when they grow up.” There’s usually no shortage of imagination in our kids when it comes to musing over their future and the excitement of those dreams.
But maybe you are having difficulty identifying your dream or remembering your dream from an earlier time in your life?
In the book, Put Your Dream To The Test, John Maxwell gives three common reasons why people may have trouble identifying their dreams.
1. Some People Have Been Discouraged from Dreaming by Others.
It’s sad to say, but lots of adults who once had a dream when they were younger, don’t any longer.
They discarded their dream long ago because of the thoughtless comments of others and a heaping shovel of discouragement.
Unfortunately, the discouragement often comes from family members or others close to them.
It’s often those closest to us that can cause us to feel the most discouragement in even having a dream, much less pursuing it.
One of the healthiest remedies for this is to reflect on these questions:
- What discouragement have you experienced by others in your personal and professional life?
- What was the impact?
- What lessons were learned?
Take the time to use your answers to these questions to remember what you once dreamed about doing or being.
Maybe it’s been a very long time since you even thought about your dream.
Now is a great time to see if it still resonates deep within you as perhaps it once did.
As parents, one of the greatest things we can do for our kids is encourage them to dream.
Parents can help kids to see themselves with limitless potential and then guide them along the paths that will take them closer to knowing what is possible for them as individuals.
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2. Some People Are Hindered By Past Disappointments and Hurts.
There’s certainly no shortage of past disappointments and hurts in the lives of adults.
Life tends to make sure of that.
But it’s not what happens to us that has the final say; it’s how we respond to what happens to us.
Our dreams can be easily crushed and forgotten because we once tried and failed, experienced setbacks and detours.
Our disappointment is the gap between expectation and reality.
When those disappointments come, we often push our dream to the side, never to revisit them again for fear of more failure or loss.
But the good news is that hindsight can give us great foresight! We can use our disappointments and losses as opportunities to tuck some “learns” under our belts and to start again.
Even as adults, we can all find ourselves struggling to overcome hurt and disappointment.
As parents, we can use our own experiences to help our kids navigate through the disappointments and hurts that are certain to come their way.
They can learn so much from our transparency and authenticity in parenting.
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3. Some People Get in the Habit of Settling for Average.
Let’s go back to the definition of a dream given earlier in this article.
“An inspiring picture of the future that energizes your mind, will and emotions, empowering you to do everything you can to achieve it. A genuine dream is a picture and blueprint of a person’s purpose and potential.
Those words seem to be the exact opposite of an average life.”
Settling for average happens in many places in our lives for many reasons.
Being willing to revive the dream that inspires you, energizes you and empowers you to achieve it, is the beginning in overcoming a mindset where you have learned to settle for average.
Parenting our kids to never settle for less than the best of what life has for them is so incredibly important.
Nurturing their creativity and their dreams is what will spur them on to realizing more of their full potential in life and lead them to more joy and fulfillment.
I’m reminded of a quote by Walt Disney:
“All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.”
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I have a dream.
I’ll bet you do you.
Have courage and make your dreams come true. Then build up your child to do the same.
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Photo credit: Getty Images