Jamie Reidy coaches would-be authors on what NOT to do when self-publishing on Kindle.
I just self-published my third book. And by “just” I mean, like, less than 12-hours ago. And I’m already kicking myself in the ass for stupidity.
It doesn’t matter why I only included these two brief sentences to describe my book: “A son struggles to avoid becoming his father. Resistance is futile.”
Uhhhh… so what the fuck does that mean?
I didn’t even mention that there’s a subtitle: “(Advice/Threats from My Old Man).”
And, now, Kindle Publishing won’t allow me into my own file to update the description. So, even though my book is listed under “Hot New Releases” I can’t tell people what it’s really about.
For instance, I’d start with a blurb praising my collection of humorous essays about me and my father. “It’s way better than ‘Hunger Games.'” – Someone Who Has Not Read “Hunger Games.”
Then, I’d explain that my essays cover a series of timeless topics between sons and fathers: grades, partying, networking, relationships, family vacations and baseball.
Lastly, I’d humble-brag that a portion of the proceeds goes to building houses for homeless kids. Albino homeless kids.
In all seriousness, “A Walk’s As Good As A Hit (Advice/Threats from My Old Man)” is the perfect Father’s Day gift for, uh, fathers. And sons. Or anybody who knows a father or a son.
Have YOU bought your dad a gift yet?
The paperback is a totally separate animal from the eBook, which I knew but forgot in my mania to get it published. #RookieMove
Wait, you didn’t describe it at all?
I’m concerned.