How do we deconstruct the crux of ‘boys will be boys’?
About Justin Lioi
Conforming to Social Constructs of Masculinity
Why is there a stigma around men and therapy?
—It’s not going to surprise anyone to hear that there is a stigma against men seeking help for mental health reasons. A large portion of the guys who come to see me have been referred over a course of many weeks or months (sometimes years) from their female partners, friends, and sometimes mothers.When I’m talking…
Why ‘What Do Women Want’ Is Precisely the Wrong Question
What are we really asking here?
What are we really asking here?
Understanding Shame and Guilt
Our self-worth and self-esteem have a lot to do with these two feelings.
Our self-worth and self-esteem have a lot to do with these two feelings.
Becoming Wary of the Binary
When we stop expecting ourselves and others to fit into the man box, we can be enjoy a happier, freer world.
When we stop expecting ourselves and others to fit into the man box, we can be enjoy a happier, freer world.
Choose Your Own Masculinity
How much of a choice do we allow ourselves to make when it comes to how we express our gender?
How much of a choice do we allow ourselves to make when it comes to how we express our gender?
Men and Emotions: Who’s the Judge?
Do you need thicker skin?
Embed from Getty Images—While many people enter counseling because they’ve been told they need to be more “emotional” (whatever that means…) another grouping of people have been told they’re “over-sensitive” and they tell me they want a “thicker skin.”When I first heard this years ago, my thought was “Wow.”We, counselors, train to support people in…
Let’s Get Rid of the American Idea of Individualism
What awaits us if we work toward something different?
What awaits us if we work toward something different?
Complaining as a Doorway to Self-Knowledge
Venting can be helpful---especially for men who have held in all their emotions---but don't stop there. Here's how to re-think complaining.
Venting can be helpful—especially for men who have held in all their emotions—but don’t stop there. Here’s how to re-think complaining.
Learning from Your Defensiveness
Your feelings will not make you less of a man.
Your feelings will not make you less of a man.
3 Ways for a Man NOT to Manage His Stress
Here are some stress management techniques that you should stay away from.
Here are some stress management techniques that you should stay away from.
Getting Out of Getting Defensive
In order to have a productive conversation, we need to become aware of our defenses.
Embed from Getty Images—Conversations about gender can often make people defensive. And by “people” I include myself along with those who identify as progressive, conservative, or otherwise. Our ideas of gender go deep and they are pretty firmly held.In order to have a productive conversation with someone, the key is not to avoid conflict but…
How Understanding Consent Has Made Me More Human
We can get in touch with the humanity that toxic masculinity and patriarchy have kept us away from.
We can get in touch with the humanity that toxic masculinity and patriarchy have kept us away from.
Are You a Man By Default?
Justin Lioi explains Masculine Default Man Setting and how to move out of the Man Box.
Justin Lioi explains Masculine Default Man Setting and how to move out of the Man Box.
Man Code: Men are Supposed to Solve Problems, NOT Complain About Them.
The patriarchy doesn’t want us “complaining” because, if we do it right, it may actually lead to change.
The patriarchy doesn’t want us “complaining” because, if we do it right, it may actually lead to change.
Knowing Yourself Isn’t Enough
How to define and redefine relationship roles.
How to define and redefine relationship roles.