Being in a relationship as a guy is never an easy pill to swallow. Women are very complex beings, and understanding them is almost an impossible thing to do. You could be having a very good time with your girlfriend, laughing and things going very well, but all of a sudden, she’d just pack up and become very upset over something you did.
It could be that she saw you liking another woman’s post on Instagram, or if you’re a gamer, she could get upset over you streaming a live game with a woman and having a good time with her. The funniest story I know is when a guy’s girlfriend saw him and a barista exchanging a smile while she gave him change after ordering a coffee. People can be so, so funny.
Although keep in mind that you don’t need to panic just because your girlfriend is angry. Her being mad at you doesn’t mean she’s falling out of love with you, but sometimes her being angry with you can lead to a breakup if not handled correctly.
That’s why in this article, I’m going to be telling you some of the signs you’d see when your girlfriend is mad at you and how to fix it so your relationship wouldn’t end in shambles. Let’s get into it.
13 Signs Your Girlfriend Might Be Steaming Mad at You
- She gives you the silent treatment
Everything’s been great for a while—she laughs at your silly jokes, and she even cracks some jokes herself. Suddenly, though, you notice her starting to give you the silent treatment.
Her voice seizes, replaced by a great deal of silence and a very deep stare that seems to see right through your soul. If she does this, she’s definitely mad at you for something.
2. She replies you vaguely
After giving you the silent treatment for a while, if she chooses to start responding to you, her response would depend on the severity of your actions. If it’s not too serious and somewhat cheeky, she might vaguely reply to your inquiries, accompanied by a twisting of the lips and an eye roll.
She may even resort to writing notes to convey her responses. However, if your actions were very serious, she won’t even acknowledge your words and will simply gesture her reply.
3. She avoids eye contact with you
When your girlfriend is mad at you, all those deep stares into each other’s eyes, chuckling, and her putting her hair behind her ears during cute moments would immediately disappear.
When you ask her what the problem is and lean closer to look at her, she immediately looks in another direction. If you persist, she’d push you away, asking you to leave her alone or simply storm away, often accompanied by a big ‘I’m angry sigh’.
4. She retracts from physical touches
When your girlfriend is angry, all those hand-holding, waist-grabbing, and cuddles become a big no. You might have a routine of sitting together on the couch, Netflix and chilling while cuddling. However, when she’s upset with you, she sits miles away and doesn’t allow you to come close.
The extent of what you did determines her reaction. If she sits down with you, it indicates that your actions aren’t a big deal and can be reconciled easily. But if she avoids cuddling or spending that intimate time with you, it signifies that what you did is a big deal.
5. There’s Sudden Change in her tone or Demeanor
When your girlfriend is really mad at you, all those sweet and playful tones she uses vanish into thin air. They’re instantly replaced by a mean and tense atmosphere around both of you. She’d speak to you in a tone that suggests you’ve done something terrible.
Also she’d become sarcastic. Responding to your questions in a way that implies you’ve deeply angered her and she’s not in a good mood. Some people default to this behavior when they’re angry; they become excessively sarcastic towards you.
6. She nitpicks your faults
If your girlfriend picks fights with you randomly over trivial matters, she’s definitely mad at you. She’d nitpick your faults and amplifies them as if she caught you cheating on her.
During this period of anger, you don’t dare leave your sock lying on the floor or your shoes not on the rack, because she’d seize that opportunity to bring up all the things you’ve been doing wrong all this while.
7. She ignores your calls and texts
This is one of the classic signs that your girl is mad at you. For some women, frequent calls and texts are the norm. They are often obsessed with texting their boyfriends, especially when it comes to sharing spicy gossip from work or school.
However, when she’s mad at you, none of this would happen. As long as she’s upset with you, communication between the both of you would dwindle to only emergencies or serious conversations.
8. She makes plans without you
It might be a norm for you and your girlfriend to go on strolls together, morning jogs, or even get manicures and pedicures together. However, when she’s mad at you, all those activities come to a halt.
She’ll wake up early in the morning and go jogging at the park alone. She’ll take her evening stroll alone, and if you offer to join her, she’ll prefer going alone rather than with you.
Additionally, she’ll make plans to get manicures and pedicures with her girlfriends instead of you. Even during movie nights together, she might order pizza for herself and start watching the movie alone without considering you
9. She cancels plans at the last minute
A significant sign that your girlfriend is mad at you is when she makes plans without including you. Another indicator is when she unexpectedly cancels plans that you were supposed to have together, without providing any valid reason.
Sometimes, she’d even prefer to cancel plans after making them with you, just to emphasize her anger. This behavior can escalate when you fail to understand why she’s upset, making her feel like you don’t care.
10. She’s very jealous and possessive
A significant sign that your girlfriend is mad at you is how she acts jealous and possessive towards you. Whenever she’s mad you’d also notice that she’s extra inquisitive when you’re on the phone.
If she hears you speaking softly or sees you smiling while chatting, she’d become uneasy and automatically conclude that you’re speaking with another woman or worse, cheating on her.
11. She withdraws from shared activities or hobbies
Another sign that your girlfriend is mad at you is when you notice her starting to lose interest in the activities you both usually do together. It’s similar to her canceling plans with you, but this is a little different.
You both may have activities you usually enjoy as a couple, which strengthen your bond. However, when she’s upset with you, she’ll put a halt on these activities or show her lack of interest by being less enthusiastic.
For instance, if you usually go for a morning jog together, she might refuse to go, or if she does, it won’t be as enjoyable as before because during the jog, she might not speak a word and would frown at you throughout the jog.
12. There’s sudden changes in her spending habits
If your girlfriend suddenly starts going on a spending spree, especially with your money, and in the process gives you attitude, it’s definitely a sign that she’s mad at you about something.
Many guys don’t know about this, but it’s another kind of default setting for some women when they’re upset. They often do this when you haven’t had a literal argument about something, but you did something that annoyed her, which you might not even be aware of.
13. Her friends or family mentions she’s upset
If your girlfriend is mad at you and she has a best friend or a family member you both are close to, trust me, they’re definitely going to know about it.
Whether she tells them directly or they notice a change in her behavior, they will be aware. If you’re close enough to them, they might even mention to you that your girlfriend is upset about something.
This can help you understand the situation better and why she’s upset, especially if they have an idea of the reason from her.
7 Steps to fix your relationship when your girlfriend is mad at you
Now, after confirming that your girlfriend is upset with you, it’s essential to acknowledge and address the situation promptly. Here are seven carefully curated steps designed to help you navigate through the challenges of resolving anger and rebuilding trust in your relationship:
- Listen to her with open ears
Talking to your girlfriend while she’s mad can be really hard. Some would immediately tell you what you’ve done wrong in the relationship, while others wouldn’t for a while.
Even if your girlfriend doesn’t say what you’ve done wrong initially, at some point, she’s going to express what made her angry. When she does, you have to ensure you’re attentive and listen to her with open ears, without getting distracted.
2. Take ownership & show remorse
After listening to her, make sure to give her space to vent her anger and frustration without interrupting or minimizing her feelings. Following that, ensure you empathize with her and ask clarifying questions to understand her perspective and where she’s coming from.
This step is crucial to ensure you won’t make the same mistake again, demonstrating that you truly understand the impact of what happened on her.
3. Apologize
Now is the time for you to give her a sincere, heartfelt apology. A simple ‘I’m sorry’ won’t suffice, you have to really mean it.
You need to tap into your romantic side and offer an honest, romantic apology. Rest assured, this won’t diminish your masculinity but will only enhance the connection of your relationship.
4. Seek common ground
After apologizing to her, the next thing you should do is seek common ground. Look for areas of agreement and propose solutions that would work for both of you, so such mishaps wouldn’t find a place in your relationship any longer.
Also, avoid using accusatory language like “You always, You never, It’s all your fault…” when seeking common ground with her, and completely focus on finding a way forward together from the problem. This helps in rebuilding trust after a fight with your girlfriend.
5. Get romantic
Small gestures, like giving her flowers or a handwritten note, are great romantic ideas when making up to your girlfriend initially. And after the ground has been softened a little, you can go big by planning a thoughtful gesture that shows you really care about her happiness and want to make things right.
This could involve cooking her favorite meal, planning a date night, or even writing her a romantic poem that would make her heart melt after hearing it.
6. Spend quality time together
Aside from being romantic during the apology, as time goes on, you should ensure to consistently spend quality time together with your girlfriend.
This is a great way to win her back after a bad fight by doing something you both genuinely enjoy, allowing you to emotionally reconnect and reminisce about the good times you share.
Perhaps the reason the problem arose in your relationship was due to the lack of quality time spent together. To strengthen your relationship and minimize potential issues, prioritize spending quality time together.
7. Move forward
Now, as you move forward in your relationship, it’s crucial to maintain open communication. Sit down together and revamp your relationship. Work together to create a path forward and prevent similar situations from occurring again.
For instance, if either of you foresees something that might potentially cause anger, immediately communicate with each other in an understandable manner. This allows both of you to adjust promptly to avoid hurting each other’s feelings.
I know all these might feel like a heavy burden for some of you, but deep down, you know the type of person you’re dating and whether she’s worth going the extra mile to make her happy and seek her forgiveness.
If she’s the type of girlfriend who constantly insults and belittles you, would you go to such lengths for her? Of course not. My advice is for you to break up with her instantly because she isn’t a keeper.
However, if she’s loving, caring, and understanding, and perhaps got mad at you for something you did, she’s the kind of woman worthy of your effort to make her happy and resolve the issue.
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This Post is republished on Medium.
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Photo credit: iStock