Are these thought patterns killing your creative dreams?
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Do you ever wish you had a DeLorean like the one in the Back to the Future movies? If so, what would do with it? Where would you go?
If I had a time-traveling DeLorean, one of the first things I’d do is go back in time a few years and give myself some advice. It would go something like this: “Stop blaming your lack of progress as a writer and artist on everyone else. You are your own worst enemy. Change your thinking, and it will change your life.”
Then I would discuss the following four bad habits that will kill any artist’s dreams. If you do any kind of creative work, this advice will help you as well.
Bad habit #1: You’re waiting for the right time.
Have you ever wished you could magically put life on hold for a few months while you focus on your creative work? Me, too. But life doesn’t work that way.
There will probably never be a time when you don’t feel busy, no one demands your attention, you have no extra responsibilities, and life isn’t somehow messy. When John Mayer sings, “Stop this train … I can’t take the speed it’s moving in,” I can totally relate.
There will never be a perfect time. That’s OK because you make it perfect each time you take action.
Bad habit #2: You’re waiting for everyone’s approval.
Maybe your dreams are a little crazy or “unrealistic.” But you’re afraid to move forward because you don’t think a certain person (or group of people) will approve.
You will never have everyone’s approval. That’s OK because your critics are not the ones you’re trying to please anyway.
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Let me ask you this: Why is that person’s approval so important to you? Why are you afraid to disappoint them?
I’m not suggesting that we should be reckless or not consider how our actions impact others. But far too often, we fail to do work that could impact others because it’s different than what people expect.
You will never have everyone’s approval. That’s OK because your critics are not the ones you’re trying to please anyway.
Bad habit #3: You’re waiting until you can do it perfectly.
It might be figuring out how to play a certain song (like Paul McCartney’s unique strum on “Blackbird,” which most guitarists don’t get quite right). It might be how to set up a blog, how to publish a book on Kindle, or how to navigate the technical aspects of setting up a podcast.
For creative people who want to keep growing, there is always something new to learn or a problem to solve. It’s easy to get frustrated and give up. I’ve seen it a million times with my guitar students.
But you can’t let frustration have the upper hand. The single greatest quality that will make you successful is the attitude that no matter what the obstacle, you will figure out a way to get it done.
The good news is that you’re not on your own. There are lots of people who are willing and able to help when you need it.
Bad habit #4: You’re waiting until you feel brave.
Of all the human emotions, fear might be the most isolating. When we’re afraid of something, it makes us feel alone. What’s worse, we’re afraid to admit it to others.
But I’m here to admit that I regularly feel afraid. Every time I publish a blog post, I fear that it might not impact anyone. Every time I walk into a college classroom, I fear my students will reject the ideas I’m presenting (or even worse, reject me as their teacher.) Every time I step onto a stage, I fear I’ll make a mistake when I sing or play.
Anytime you put something out there for the world to see, there’s a chance somebody might not like it. They might criticize it or even hate it. On the other hand, they might love it!
Bravery isn’t about eliminating fear. It’s about doing your art in spite of it.
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The issue isn’t whether you feel afraid. Everyone is afraid sometimes. Bravery isn’t about eliminating fear. It’s about doing your art in spite of it.
There will probably never be a time when you don’t feel a little fear. And if there is, it means you need to climb bigger mountains and take on some new challenges.
Instead of worrying about what might happen if you mess up, take that emotional energy and think about the future you are creating. Do something today that will help make your dream a reality.
Because guess what?
There will never be a perfect time
There will always be someone who doesn’t approve.
You will rarely do anything perfectly.
You will never be far away from fear.
These are all reasons—lies, really—I’ve told myself about why I haven’t done my best. I know what it feels like to spin your wheels and never make any progress. I’ve practiced the bad habits and believed the lies. As a result, I paid the price.
We can do better. We can choose to get busy working on our creative dreams today. We can dance to our own music in spite of the fear we feel.
Look over the list of the four bad habits above. Which of them do you relate to the most, and what do you plan to do about it?
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Photo: Flickr/Ralf Schulze
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