Most men are lonely because they’re trying to be one of the following stereotypes.
If you fit into one of these descriptions, STOP IT NOW.
These guys repel women far more than they attract them.
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1. The Nice Guy
The ‘nice guy’ always gets the girl in romantic comedies.
In reality, he often repulses women.
When you’re too kind or generous to a woman you barely know, it reeks of desperation. It creeps women out because they know they haven’t done anything to deserve such kindness.
Women want to date men who are better than them. Acting like the generous ‘nice guy’ immediately shows that you think they’re above you.
Some women will take advantage of your generosity. But they’ll never be turned on by the ‘nice guys’ in their life, no matter how many favors they do.
This includes the guys who pretend to be a woman’s ‘friend’ in the hope that she’ll eventually want something more. He’s the worst type of ‘nice guy’, and he deserves the inevitable heartbreak of hearing that she “sees him like a brother.” That’s generally what happens when men aren’t honest about their intentions.
Yes, you can be kind to women. But you shouldn’t supplicate to them as if they’re goddesses. Not if you ever want to date them. Nor should you ever mask your true intentions.
Relationships are reciprocal. If you’re doing favors for women and getting nothing in return, you’re not a “nice guy”. You’re a doormat.
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2. The Asshole
Upon realizing that “nice guys always finish last”, a lot of men conclude that “women only like assholes”.
But that’s simply not true.
If you’re always disrespectful to women, you’ll only ever attract partners with severe self-esteem issues. And even they’ll eventually find the courage to dump your ass.
The “women only like assholes” trope is touted by romantic comedies too. In high school films, the hot cheerleaders always date the school bully. But that’s just Hollywood hyperbole. Bullies don’t get any action in real life. That’s why they’re assholes to everyone.
If you’re trying to attract women, don’t be a ‘bad guy’ or a ‘nice guy’. Be a ‘good guy.’
The good guy is respectful to everyone he meets, but he doesn’t bend over backwards for strangers. He’s secure enough in himself to treat others well, but he doesn’t need to be a people-pleaser. If someone says something silly, he might make fun of them. If someone doesn’t treat him well, he’ll stand up for himself.
That’s the balance that every asshole needs to find.
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3. The Sugar Daddy
Sugar daddies get laid when there’s an official arrangement in place.
But are these women trembling with sexual desire? Not a chance.
The same goes for the guys who try to throw money at their dating problem without an official sugar arrangement.
I’m talking about the guy who buys $2,000 tables at the hottest nightclubs. This guy will still only get some action if he has an attractive personality. In a nightclub, that generally means he’s FUN, confident and outgoing. The quiet introvert who buys a table is just going to get used for his Belvedere bottles. Such a guy would be better off improving his social skills to avoid getting scammed by gold diggers.
Money can get you access to a better quality of women — but the gold diggers will always be sniffing around them too. To attract a genuine woman, you’ll need a personality to back up your riches.
Not interested in developing one of those? Maybe sugar websites are for you. Just don’t expect the genuine burning desire you’d experience in a real relationship.
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4. The Fake Male Feminist
Hey now! I believe women deserve equal opportunity to pursue whatever they want in life. Real feminists are great.
But the guys who go the extra mile to identify as a ‘male feminist’ and spend time at rallies and so forth? When they have a hidden agenda, they’re not fooling anybody.
Most of these guys are doing this to stand out and get women’s attention, usually because they have no traditionally attractive qualities.
But it’s so see-through that most women will treat them as a ‘nice guy’ at best.
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5. Mr. Machismo
Women like strong men who can protect them. But the guy who gets aggressive and starts fights in the bar every weekend? He is not attractive.
Such acts of machismo are now labeled as toxic masculinity. Indeed, aggression is a masculine trait.
But not being able to control anger — especially not enough that you end up hurting someone — is not someone anyone should date. It’s actually a sign of weakness, not strength.
Strong masculine men can remain calm in times of conflict — and then defend themselves if they have to.
That’s far more attractive than the brute threatening to kick the ass of everyone who bumps into him or puts a word out of place.
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6. The Show-Off
Women appreciate if you’re rich, successful or talented. But show-offs are generally over-compensating for something.
And women can sniff that out.
If they sense you’re trying too hard to impress them, it’ll usually be game over.
Sure, you can drive your Lamborghini to the club. You can even upload photos of it to your Instagram. But if you’re showing women pictures of it unprompted, it can leave a sour taste. It’s always better that they discover these things organically.
Trying too hard to be the centre of attention can also bite you in the ass. Truly confident men don’t need to force themselves on people this way.
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7. The Wallflower
This is somewhat of a paradox, as I just explained that women don’t like show-offs.
But that doesn’t mean you should lean against the bar not talking to anyone all night.
A lot of men justify this behavior by telling themselves that they’re the prize and that women should come to them.
But most women don’t like making the first move. And few of them even notice the wallflower of the party.
They’re certainly not marveling at how cool and mysterious you look — not unless you’re incredibly handsome.
You need to be the guy who makes things happen with women. Just don’t be a show-off. In fact, don’t be any of the stereotypes in this list.
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If you’re the type of guy who struggles to attract or keep a woman’s attention, my book Big Dick Energy will help you. It features 12 powerful exercises to help you unleash your confident masculine energy and attract amazing beautiful women. You can learn more by clicking here or watching the video below.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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