Question: When having an affair with a married person, should I feel guilty if I am not married? I mean they are the one cheating on their spouse so is it really my problem? My friends say I should have some remorse, but for what?
Answer: Whoa! My love, the energy/tone with which you are asking your question is so defensive, so filled with justification, so void of self responsibility… it feels like you’re coming from your mind, your triggered mind. I don’t hear your heart, your truth, your wisdom… just a reaction.
Is it true that it’s challenging for you to feel your true feelings about having attracted and chosen an unavailable partner? Is it true that you’re feeling attacked for your choice and thus can’t slow down enough to hear the quiet voice within?
Assuming your having an affair with someone who is not telling their spouse they are sleeping with you… why does that lack of integrity turn you on? Why do you respect that? Why does that make you feel safe they won’t do that on you too?
I don’t think punishing yourself with guilt is going to get you anywhere… yet I do feel it’s time to slow WAY down, get out the line of fire from your friends, take a weekend alone in nature and FEEL into your heart. What are the advantages and disadvantages of your choice? How does this choice align with your values or not? How does this choice bring out the best in you or not? How does this choice support your soul’s evolution or not? Are you willing to face the both the benefits and consequences of your choice? Are you acting in alignment with your deepest desires?
Your energy doesn’t seem grounded, centered, heart open or calm. Thus there’s a truth waiting to be revealed and I encourage you to hear it.
From there you will know what to do. Then it’s time to find the courage to act in accordance with that truth, no matter what your lover or your friends say. Only you get to look deeply in your eyes at the end of each day. Only you get to lie you head to rest knowing you acted in alignment with your authentic self. Only you get to die knowing you always had choices… and did your best to be the best you possible. Only you know if having an affair with a married lover is a contribution to your soul.
Should you desire a non judgmental straight talking heart open guide home to your truth, I would be honored to sit in the fire with you to discover what’s true so you can live your best life. You can apply for a complimentary session at www.AllanaPratt.com/connect.
Great love and thank you for reaching out, Allana xoox