John Pavlovitz pens a letter to those with damaging “Christian” beliefs.
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Dear Offended Christian,
I’m terribly sorry that your feelings are hurt again. I feel badly about that. None of us likes to be criticized, so I totally get it.
I know I’ve said some pretty hard words to you recently, and maybe I’ve been somewhat less than “cheery” in my delivery, but that happens when you’re tired.
And I am really tired:
I’m tired of hearing you telling gay people that they can’t simultaneously be both gay and Christian.
I’m tired of having to explain what “Transgender” means to adult Christian people, who I’m quite sure have Internet access and should know better by now that it ain’t “a guy in a dress”.
I’m tired of arrogant pulpit bullies who believe they’re entitled to tell people where they can pee and who they can marry and whether they really love Jesus or not.
I’m tired of you being more outraged by red coffee cups and department store restrooms than by poverty and racism and gun violence and our crumbling school system.
I’m tired of gay people being accused of the kind of predatory behavior that straight men have been exhibiting, since the man cave was—an actual cave.
I’m tired of reminding you that the number of times Jesus spoke about gender identity and sexual orientation in the Gospels—is zero.
I’m tired of having to explain to people that although I am a Christian, that I’m not that type of Christian; the kind that is generous with damnation and stingy with Grace.
I’m tired of LGBTQ teens cutting their forearms and jumping off buildings because they’re told by their church friends that God hates them, because their Christian parents told them, because their Christian pastors told them.
I’m tired of followers of Jesus who don’t seem interested in cracking open a book to see what we’ve learned about the brain and the body in 2,000 years, or to realize that gender identity and sexual orientation don’t equal the word “homosexuality” in the Bible.
I’m tired of all the time I have to spend undoing the damage the Church has done to queer kids and their families.
I’m tired of religious folk who seem to want small government everywhere except the bedroom and bathroom.
I’m tired of Scientific ignorance being treated as if it’s a Christian virtue.
I’m tired of hearing you preach verbatim the gospel of Fox News.
I’m tired of high-profile pastors blaming gay people for 9/11 and Hurricane Katrina and ISIS and child obesity.
I’m tired of waiting for you to show up in this world and actually show the freakin’ love of Jesus to people the way he did and told you to, without excuses or caveats or theological tap dancing to avoid it.
I’m tired of this wasteful, fruitless, mean-spirited, unprovoked, unbiblical attack on the LGBTQ community, that is squandering so much time and life and beauty in the name of a God who is supposedly Love.
I’m tired of so many people believing that “Christian” and “bigot” are synonymous—and not disagreeing with them.
I’m tired of a Church which seems to be so ambivalent toward the teachings and example of Jesus.
I’m tired of a Christianity that is making me more and more embarrassed to be associated with it.
So I get that your feelings are hurt. I understand that you’re offended, and that’s not my intention.
But listen, if you’re going to tell a group of people that they’re going to Hell simply for existing, and you’re going to continually target those people through the Church and the Law and your social media accounts, don’t get angry with me when I tell you you’re being hateful and judgmental and ignorant.
It could be worse.
At least I’m not damning you for all eternity.
Sincerely,
A Very Tired Christian
This article originally appeared on John Pavlovitz
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Photo credit: Getty Images
“by their fruits you shall know them…”
I agree with much of what you say Jon but you’re lumping all of Christians in your tome. You’re actually railing against the far right as I am against the far left. It’s just that the far left gets much more positive airtime for their allegedly humanistic viewpoints. I think they’re hypocrites but arguing that is like peeing into a fan these days. I’m a Christian. I don’t feel that way and millions more of us feel the same way as I do. We’re not damn in anyone for eternity. Some fools are but far right evangelicals are far fewer… Read more »
No Mark the far right gets much more airtime than the far left when you look at how the mainstream media is controlled by corporations and right wing wealthy people. Right wingers are hypocrites and arguing with them is like peeing into a fan and like talking to someone who has no capacity for logical, rational thought. You have Dominists Christians infiltrating the military even at the higher ranks and trying to shove Christianity down people’s throat. If far right wing evangelicals are far fewer and far less resepcted, then they would have been dropped from TV channels a long… Read more »
I meant to say so many Christian radio stations.
I agree with you, Mark. Too often the wrong people grab the mic on stage and get “karaokeed away.” The result is that all calling themselves Christians get bashed in return. I pray for many things, all to one end: that Jesus’ love will prevail in our land, starting in MY community.
I am tired of church leaders who have not done a thing to help put an end to poverty, an end to corporate and individual greed, private and public sector corruption, hunger, homeless, fighting for a person’s access to food, education, good paying job, free medical, labor and job security, etc. If this is the best the churches can do, then I don’t blame people for dropping out of church and no longer believing in God.
Here is what George Carlin said about religion: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8r-e2NDSTuE
But you should be happy. It was the churches, mainly Catholic and Lutheran that brought a lot of the so called asylum seekers in, against federal immigration laws, gave them sanctuary and hid them from arrest. Pick and choose.
Yeah Mark, and look at how the religious organizations have refused to back stronger labor right laws and unions in this country. Furthermore, many of them fought against civil rights in the country and if they had spoke out aginst corporations back in the 1920s and 1930s, the corporations would have driven the clergy out of town, cut off the utilities to the churches and padlock the churches’ doors once the clergy was thrown out of the community.
I don’t think this has anything to do with believing or giving that up, in god. I believe in god. Not crazy about religion but deeply believe in god and try to live my life accordingly. Dropping out of church has literally no bearing on doing anything not in the right vein. I’ll never forgive the churches for their stance on this stupidity of bringing sanctuary in violation of the law. Sactimonious at best, they brought these people in yet expected everyone else to take care of them. The congregation had no money to house or feed them yet did… Read more »
Yeah, Mark, well you need to put some of the blame on the Mexican government because immigration is a safety value so they don’t have to carry out any kind of political, social, and economic reform to take care of their own people. It is also stupid that corporations think that they are people as stated by the Supreme Court and expects us to take care of them. Dropping out of the church has a lot to do with the fact that we were brainwash to do the right thing according to the Bible and for many people they found… Read more »
Your essay expresses my feelings exactly. I am tired of hearing the opinions those who follow a literal, cherry-picked Bible. If they want to live with all of that bigotry, so be it. But they need tp trying to control and legislate the rest of us. Extreme religions of all denominations are simply other forms of authoritarian and toxic political systems.
“But listen, if you’re going to tell a group of people that they’re going to Hell simply for existing, and you’re going to continually target those people through the Church and the Law and your social media accounts, don’t get angry with me when I tell you you’re being hateful and judgmental and ignorant.” … You may want to post this to the More than 34,000 black churches from 15 denominations, representing 15.7 million African Americans, that have pulled away from the Presbyterian Church (USA) because of its newly declared endorsement and acceptance of same-sex “marriage” through a recent vote.
You keep posting this factoid about 34,000 African American churches as if it actually means something. First of all, it’s more correct to say that an organization that claims to represent 34,000 African American churches pulled away from the PCUSA because of gay marriage. Secondly, I doubt many of these churches had any actual relationship with their local PCUSA churches since we all know that Sunday morning is the most segregated time in America. Beside smiling together for the cameras at some ecumenical event, I doubt very much that there was a relationship to pull away from.
I will continue posting it because the main stream liberal media ignores it, just as they ignore what many blacks say because it doesn’t fit into the progressive liberal plan. You claim that they may not have had a relationship in the first place is an assumption on your part rather then fact. Interesting how you discard what a large black community is saying. Additionally I will continue to state that with the various denominations that have accepted gay marriage with open arms are showing NO increase in population and that in some cases are showing a decline. The “idea”… Read more »
It’s actually irrelevant with respect to the article you replied to since the author only mentions gay marriage in passing. Secondly, the quote, you are continually repeating refers to an organization, the National Black Church Initiative, rather than 34,000 churches. Thus, it is not actually “what a large black community is saying”, it is what self-appointed spokesperson of 34,000 churches, Rev. Anthony Evans is saying. Mainstream Protestant denominations have been shrinking for over 40 years, long before gay marriage was even an issue. Finally, your idea that “Not accepting gay marriage has nothing to do with accepting and embracing gay… Read more »
They have been shrinking for a number of years and the shrinkage can be tracked to when the “new age” feel good churches started popping up. I’ve been to a couple of them myself and found them to be a lot of fun but what it showed to me is that there was little about God and a lot about the people and how they feel.
Personally, I’m okay with their shrinking in that what will remain will be a strong faithful congregation.
What mainstream liberal media, Mr. Brechlin? and the Afro-Americans who are on the mainstream media are nothing but a bunch of Uncle Toms.
Well that is too bad Mark. And there is no mainstream liberal media and the conservative media doesn’t allow for different points of view in this country. If you don’t like it, too bad.
Yet another article that shows its disdain toward Christians … why am I not surprised.. There are plenty of denominations that are all accepting with LGBTQ. What a great country we live in that there are so many denominations where anyone can pick and choose what they want to fit their own personal beliefs. With the clear increase in various denominations that have accepted LGBTQ, I’m amazed that their congregations overall have not increased and in some cases decreased. And BTW Cha Cha, MLK Said the following Question: My problem is different from the ones most people have. I am… Read more »
I hadn’t seen that passage before Tom. Thanks for sharing it. In mentioning MLK, what I am talking about was the essential strategic choices he made in his own work versus the author’s, King made the wise and conscious decision to focus his ministry on lighting candles and giving a vision of the promised land. In contrast, the other guy back then, Stokeley Carmichael, chose the path of cursing the darkness. There’s plenty of darkness to cuss at, and it burns you out when you get stuck doing that. Stokeley got tired. This author’s getting tired for the same reason.… Read more »
You mean to say, a Baptist minister in the 1960s said something completely uninformed about homosexuality? I’m shocked. This is the classic “appeal to authority” logical fallacy.
Well, brother – everything your tired of is in the damn book – just like with Islam. So you can fight against it (and so do a lot of very peaceable Muslims) – but really the problem isn’t the idiots. It’s the memes they’re fed since childhood. A lot of them never switch – including the much lauded Pope Francis. If you just like getting in fights with people you think are idiots (and I think so too) – just go look in the mirror to see where the tiredness originates. Or you could look at folks like MLK and… Read more »