All the time I was saying that Tinder is an application, where you can find one-night stand as maximum. Most of the time I was only facing abuses and toxic people or some guys who were not my type and not my level, trying to find easy-going girls. That’s why I actually deleted and restored an app three times. And the last time I installed it again I was expecting nothing but one-time dates to boost my self-awareness. Now, I’m happy with a guy I found on dating app. How it happened and how can you find your 100% match?
Right Positioning
Once, my bestie told me Tinder is a perfect app to network and find people to work with and make collaborations. I could not understand what was she saying. But the issue was that I had a typical girlish Tinder profile with my key values and main advantages mentioned instead of mentioning what am I looking for and my life-work achievements. If you save those attractive high-quality pictures, but mention in your profile what is your job, what are your advantages and what do you look for honestly, you will make a right profile of yourself, that will be corresponding to your goals and values.
Moreover, you need to do your best to apply filters and search for the right audience. Withdraw people who are not “that type” you need and never accept someone “just to try”. Be strict and take Tinder as Instagram direct saving only top chats and talking only to people you want to talk the most. Having right profile and right positioning will make you start looking for your audience. What is more interesting, if you will run out of people from your filters, Tinder will start making similar recommendations. That’s exactly how I found my crush, since he was not responding to the age filter (he’s one year older than me and I was filtering only people 5 years older), but I really liked his profile and pictures. Moreover, I felt super interested and comfortable from the first texts he sent. And right that day I went out with him.
Easy-Going Approach
I decided to make one day for the dates and it was Sunday. He offered me to go play basketball and despite the fact I don’t play basketball and despite the fact I never imagined the first date like that, I agreed since it was creative and I had a really good mood. I never expected it will be him in fact. But we were talking for 6 hours and I never got tired of him and our conversations.
Be open-minded. Stop applying the mindset where “you’re the queen who’s winning poor boys hearts”. Think of others as normal people, who also spared their free time to talk to you, so just be a good company for them. You may never talk again, but let these people don’t regret they decided to pay attention to you.
Be yourself and keep in mind that you’re meeting these people for the first time and you can never see them again, so you can be 100% you and treat them just like interesting people to talk to.
No Expectations
And the most important part is to have no expectations. You don’t need to expect that he will be “the one you looked for” or expect that you will be able to build relations with someone from the dating app. I’m still surprised we’ve met each other there. But at the same time, I never wanted relations that time and now its even war in Ukraine and we still managed to start dating under the bombs.
You need to keep in mind, that you’re meeting the love of your life right the moment you need it the least. Because only then you can be easy, light, be yourself and not be obsessed with someone. So, take it easy. Tinder can be cool, just stop waiting. And right that very moment Tinder will surprise you a lot.
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This post was previously published on Hello, Love.
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