There may be a circumstance when somebody is using you. It’s never a good feeling to be used, but unfortunately, it can sneak up on you.
They might be using your relationship for their gain if it’s only about them and never about you.
If you get the impression that your relationship is one-sided, ignoring it will only make things harder for you in the long run, even if having an honest conversation with them can sometimes help resolve the issues.
I have gathered together a few signs that somebody is using you in a relationship.
1. They never express gratitude.
That is a problem if you do not receive signs of appreciation.
O’Reilly stated to New Line Cinema:
“You likely expect your efforts to be met with appreciation”
It’s possible that your partner feels entitled to your services if they don’t express gratitude (preferably in a way that appeals to you).
This is likely to become a more difficult problem in the long run, it is important to discuss your expectations and requirements right away.
It’s smarter to have an intense discussion now than to stay quiet and permit your disappointment to develop into hatred or disdain.
You shouldn’t always feel like you have to be the one doing everything, especially if someone else isn’t contributing as much or even just saying thanks from time to time.
2. They are always the focus of the conversation.
When your conversations with someone are all about them, the relationship is likely one-sided because they are getting more out of it than you are. You could be the person they need to talk to, or they could like to be the center of attention all the time and be able to be with you.
3. They constantly request favors.
You shouldn’t be afraid to ask for a favor from time to time. However, if a person keeps asking you for favors and isn’t willing to help whenever you need it, that could be another sign that they are using you.
According to Heidi McBain, MA, LMFT, LPC, RPT, a licensed marriage and family therapist,
“if someone isn’t enjoying your company but always has a purpose for wanting to see you, soon they be done with you and the relationship once they get the job they want at your company or start dating your cute friend”
4. Relationships that are only about one person can lead to resentment.
If you’re always the one taking care of them, you might start to feel resentful, which is only natural but could also be a sign that they’re using you.
One-sided relationships can result in resentment. No one should feel resentful toward the other if the two of you have equally invested in the relationship.
5. Your emotional needs are never taken into account or even addressed.
The emotions of everyone need to be taken into account. Both parties’ emotional needs are not only taken into consideration but also should be attempted to be met in a healthy and balanced manner.
If you never get what you need, that’s another indication that the person might be only interested in themselves.
According to Leikam,
“they could be using you” if “you feel like you are the one doing all of the giving in the relationship and you find you aren’t getting your emotional needs met.”
6. They never appreciate you.
It’s important to feel appreciated.
If the person you’re in a relationship with never or rarely makes you feel appreciated, they might not actually like you.
In every relationship you have, you should feel appreciated at least occasionally.
“Tell your partner that you want to feel appreciated.”
Call them out if they respond by trying to make you feel needy. Tell them that if they expect the effort, you expect the thanks because we all want to be acknowledged and thanked.
7. You always bail them out.
You shouldn’t just bail someone out all the time.
Assuming you’re continuously rescuing them, that is a very decent sign that they could be using you.
“you shouldn’t spend money bailing out your partner from their problems in a relationship all the time.”
It might be a sign that they are using you to solve the problems. You ought to have the impression that you are being taken care of and that your partner is always concerned about you.
Thanks for reading!
This post was previously published on medium.com.
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