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There are certain things that seem to be staples of growing up. We look at them as markers of our childhood and adolescence, and when we miss them, we may have a sense of things not being quite right.
I once knew a man who would often express his disappointment that he never attended his prom. It was a big deal, and he just hadn’t thought so at the time. It stayed with him as a regret long after high school had finished.
There are so many experiences like that. Maybe we didn’t get the opportunity for that picture-perfect childhood. Maybe our families put the fun in dysfunctional, or maybe we didn’t have the financial means to participate in some of the things that we’d have liked to along the way.
For me, it was camp. I’ll be honest: I went to camp. But I went to a religious camp. There is definitely a difference. While my friends at their secular camps were enjoying actual tent camping, s’mores, hikes, horseback riding, and canoeing, I was sitting in chapel.
I was doing team building exercises with a group. I was participating in a poorly written play about religion. It was all arts and crafts, swimming, and falling back to see if our teammate would catch us—squeezed between morning, afternoon, and evening chapel sessions. Does that sound like fun? It really wasn’t. And while I enjoyed the new friendships, I wish I had the opportunity to have had the full camp experience that was about something other than religion.
The good news is that it’s never too late! Here are nine boyhood experiences that we can still participate in as adults:
1. Camp! Seriously, this is a thing! There are camps for adults—with or without children. If we missed out on this childhood staple, we can still get the experience.
2. Prom! There are proms for adults. I love the themed ones. I’m determined to hit the thrift store for a tacky 80’s dress and tease up my hair for an 80’s prom one of these days.
3. Team sports! There are so many adult leagues that exist in communities. It’s not too late to join a team sport and see what that’s like. It’s not about being good at it as much as it is about having fun.
4. Field trips! For adults who might have missed out on field trips as kids, it’s not too late to join a group going to an event or even plan an outing to something that we might have missed. Head to a local museum or even tour a farm.
5. Lessons! This is another one that I seem to have skipped, but there are so many lessons available for adults. It’s never too late to learn. I never learned to swim, and yet I just took my first swimming class. Other classes available to us include painting, musical instruments, and even basic courses we might have been interested in such as philosophy or art history.
6. Another language! Maybe we didn’t apply ourselves when we took Spanish or French, or maybe we were just more interested in learning something else like Italian or German. Whatever the reason, if we didn’t learn a language growing up, there’s no reason we can’t learn one now.
7. Braces! I speak from experience. I got mine on at 35, and I still have a few months left until they come off. My family simply couldn’t afford to straighten my teeth, but as an adult, I had a dental issue that necessitated them. Even without dental insurance, I decided to give this one thing I missed out on a go. I’ve spent my life insecure about my smile, and soon I won’t have to worry about that. What’s great is that my orthodontist said that I’m far from the oldest patient they’ve had.
8. Birthday parties! I know people who grew up without getting actual birthday parties. First of all, that’s a damn shame! Second, birthday parties aren’t just for kids. There’s no reason we can’t get a unicorn cake (OMG—I want one so bad), invite all of our friends, and enjoy a party for ourselves. In fact, unless our friends are total jerks, they’ll be excited to come hang out, celebrate us, and eat unicorn cake. Anyone who rains on that parade should have their invitation withdrawn and not get invited to future fabulous events.
9. Slumber parties! Like birthday parties, slumber parties are one of those childhood experiences that not everyone got to enjoy. I’ve often had a slumber party with my girlfriends as an adult. Everyone stays over, and we spend the night talking, eating our favorite foods, and listening to music or watching movies. There’s not an age limit to enjoying this experience.
I’m sure I’m leaving out a number of note-worthy experiences. The point is that as adults we have to sometimes re-parent ourselves. We have to find ways of giving ourselves the experiences that we may have wanted or needed and didn’t get. It could be something as small as swimming lessons or as big as giving ourselves an emotional experience that was withheld from us. It doesn’t matter what it is. What matters is that it’s never too late!
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This post was originally published on medium.com, and is republished here with the author’s permission.
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Photo credit: Getty Images
It’s extra wonderful if you do those things with your child. Take him/her camping with you!