In the spring of 1979, I came out to my mom as a gay man. It was the first time that I came out, and most certainly was not the last time. I came out and stayed out from the age of 20. Now that I am 62, I often reflect on my path to pride, especially during pride month.
I started my first corporate job in early 1982 and came out within the first couple of months. I remember the fear that I felt after I had come out and realized that losing my job was a real possibility. I had no job protections at that time and remain massively grateful to my manager, who did not terminate my employment.
I have been out longer than many of my fellow members of the LGBTQ community have been alive. It is exciting to think that I have amassed over four decades of experience as a gay man living openly in my professional and personal lives. Sharing my stories with audiences makes me feel very proud of living in integrity for my whole adult life.
Living as an openly gay man for me came with some real threats to my well-being. While I did not experience any hate speech nor hate acts, I did live in fear of discrimination. It amazes me to think that I am hard-pressed to find any overt discrimination in my life experiences.
I lived as an openly gay man in two long-term relationships without the same rights as legally married couples.
The potential for losing my job was real throughout my 35-year corporate career giving there were no protections for the members of the LGBTQ community.
In June 1994, I made a trip to New York City that would have a lasting impact on me and my confidence in living as an openly gay man. I attended the Stonewall 25 and Gay Pride celebrations when public opinion about the LGBTQ community was not favorable.
My experience in New York City in 1994 gave me a boost in feeling more confident and empowered, which has not dissipated over the past 27 years.
Today I am legally married to my husband in the state we live in and the other 49 states!!! Recently Gallup released a report that showed 70% of US citizens support same-sex marriages. This result represents a 10% increase in just six years.
As of June 2020, the members of the LGBTQ community have federal protection when it comes to employment-hiring, promoting, and firing practices that cannot be discriminatory against LGBTQ candidates and employees. This protection came as a result of the Supreme Court decisions on two unprecedented cases.
The fortitude that I have developed over the past 42 years has come from many of my life experiences. Additionally, the laws that have changed in support of the LGBTQ community have added to my ability to live with the same rights as other US citizens.
One of the benefits of living my path to pride is sharing my stories with others who might feel more confident or empowered by hearing them.
While we each have a unique path to pride, we can all use the support and encouragement from others who have gone ahead of us.
With much gratitude.
—
This post is republished on Medium.
—
Photo credit: Shutterstock