While swiping on my phone, in the midst of endless swiping nights, I wonder if I was better off trying to meet girls at the bar counter at the city’s most popular pub, which is known to be bustling with friendly faces. Maybe I could even bring myself to ask for advice from my friend Joe, a proponent of casual dating. He often boasts about the choices and convenience it offers. And that’s where our whole discussion about online dating vs offline dating began.
One time Joe spoke to his date for a good two to three months before he could get to meet his hot date. I would say, he was just plain lucky. Nothing like that ever happened to me. The last time I met someone after a month of virtual dating, I realized much to my dismay that the only thing common between my date in real & my date in her picture was the color of her dress! Aha.
No wonder then that those who support offline dating contend that meeting people in real life is the real deal. They believe that this is the only way to amount to something meaningful. Undoubtedly, this online dating vs offline dating back-and-forth can go on forever. Matchmaking platforms today are unraveling that sweet spot in the middle. While over a period of time, offline dating has transitioned to online dating, for couples these days a blended approach is on the cards.
You Get What You Sign up for – Offline Dating
To begin with, when dating through offline means, from the moment you first say Hi, you know what you are going to be signing up for. Well, at least partly. You generally meet people who are acquaintances or are known to the ones that set you up. This means that they are not exactly strangers. Even if you meet a person you don’t really know at a bar, you can still have the chance to know them more. When you meet in person, the chances of developing a chemistry and bond are higher. You are able to create more meaningful relationships when meeting people in real life. The conversations feel authentic and you can better judge the emotions, intentions and interests of the other person. Doesn’t reading this transport you to a dream of bumping into ‘the one’ instead of swiping on their profile?
On the flip side, as most of us are on our devices for so long, meeting someone in person, without any prior online interaction can be too much of a pressure. At the same time, offline dating limits your range of choices. Your friends and family will know only a limited number of potential matches, right? Invariably, many who oppose offline dating consider it to be too much effort, especially if they are not looking for something serious.
Online Dating — Scanning the Menu Outside a Restaurant which Just Closed for Lunch
To me, online dating is similar to scanning the menu of a restaurant that just closed for lunch. But, let me turn the tables and look at it from Joe’s perspective. On the face of if, online dating is a paradise that comes with several advantages to thrive on. Firstly, the choices you have are off the roof. You don’t have to settle for only those who are in your extended network. At the same time, those you meet may not even necessarily be from the same city, state, country or even continent as you.
Imagine the big pool of potential matches you can access. Another point for online dating revolves around how you can filter your matches. This allows you to engage only with those who fit your preferences. Finally, because online dating is a lot like online shopping, you can swipe right when you have the time. Wondering how something so wonderful can have a downside?
However, if you look closely, you will realize that too much choice can also cause chaos. How do you know which would be the best pick from the entire lot. Yes, you can connect with people from all across the globe. But, pause and think what are the chances of a cross-continent connection turning into something real?
The Sweet Spot — Have Your Cake & Eat it Too
While each has some merit to it, challenges also come along. The sweet spot for those who are looking for a perfect match would be an ‘AND’ approach instead of the ‘OR’. And that’s where dating and matchmaking is heading towards. Individuals are taking the middle way out with a mix of both online and offline methods.
Here, you can start with an online dating app which is location enabled. You will get a wide range of choices of matches which are location sensitive. You may want to kick start the conversation with a virtual interaction on the platform itself. Fortunately, location proximity will empower you to meet in real life and take the dialogue forward in case you click. It brings together the best of both worlds, doesn’t it? On the one hand, you get a screen full of choices and the ability to filter your matches, at your convenience. On the other hand, you can follow up your conversations on social meetups and actually have a chance of having something meaningful.
However following up those conversations in midst of endless client presentations, work deadlines & back to back meetings has become quite a bit of challenge. In such a situation, reaching this sweet spot and focusing on streamlining your love life is highly desirable but superbly un-achievable. Here is where some new age dating apps are making a difference, & completely transforming the way singles meet. The goal of these apps is to use technology as an enabler to meet people in real life.
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Previously published on “Hello, Love”, a Medium publication.
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Photo credit: istockphoto.com