I thought my days of chatting with guys online were over years ago. For one thing I am in a relationship, for another, I am 40 now and I am starting to get wrinkles. Who thought that guys would still want to talk to me online?
And I don’t mean in an “I’m a Nigerian prince, will you cash this cashier’s check for me?” kind of way. They are trying to flirt with me. It’s sort of cute I suppose.
I am in an open relationship, so I suppose I could let them chat me up. But I just have this feeling like someone I would want to be with wouldn’t just be chatting up random strangers online, especially when all my social media accounts are clearly used for business.
And why is it that every single guy online sounds exactly the same?
“Hi, I saw your profile picture and you are so beautiful. Do you want to get to know each other better?”
Well, I’m glad you like the picture. I had those headshots professionally done for my website, and it wasn’t cheap. But if you look a little closer I have eye wrinkles.
So I tell them, I have a boyfriend.
“Oh, ok. Do you just want to be friends?”
So that means they want to know if I am married and willing to cheat. Not a good sign either. And it screams of desperation. Why would you want to chat with me, when there are hundreds of single, pretty women out there?
It’s back to, do you want to cash this cashier’s check? What’s the catch?
And, how do you tell some random on the internet that yes, you are in an open relationship, but no, you probably aren’t interested.
My “type” isn’t desperate.
I guess if you are hot, or rich, or interesting though, I might be interested. How do you screen for that?
Also did I mention, my book promoter is also an admin on my social media accounts, so you might be talking to him instead?
I haven’t dated anyone online in probably 20 years. I don’t know how to even do this anymore. I met my ex-husband on AOL chat back in the day. But back then you would just ask someone their a/s/l and if they had any pictures.
Now, they already have pictures. So it comes down to, how do you know their pictures aren’t fake? How do you know if they are interesting? How do you know if it is worth it to put yourself out there after all this time?
For the first time in a long time, I am actually “open to being open,” if that makes any sense. We have always had an open relationship, but after a bad experience I didn’t want to put myself out there again. I think I am finally ready.
But how do you even meet people in 2023? I think I need someone from GenZ to explain the world of chatting with guys on Instagram to me.
Or, maybe I’ll just wait another 20 years.
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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.
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