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The story of this YouTuber’s dad started in 2020, right when the pandemic struck, and it helped millions of people, especially young boys, to get through that challenging period. After some time, another YouTube channel called “Mom, how do I?” was created to help young girls prepare for becoming adults.
These channels barely help solve the problem of children being raised without a father or a mother. The percentage and number of children living with both parents have decreased in the past years. As much as we don’t like it, it highly affects the child’s future academic achievements and can cause other internalising and externalising problems.
The “Dad, how do I?” movement
Rob Kenney started his YouTube channel on the 1st of April, 2020, to “provide useful, practical content to many basic tasks that everyone should know how to do”. He grew up without his father since he left when Rob and his brother were only 12. Their relationship with their mother wasn’t that good, as she used to struggle with alcoholism.
But that didn’t stop Rob from becoming a responsible and kind man, and, luckily, it eventually led him to create this channel as a support for young people struggling with growing up alone. You can find on his channel everything from:
- Lawn care, like how to mown grass or to plant grass seeds;
- Car videos, where he’ll teach you how to check your car’s oil or the pressure in your ties;
- How to use certain tools, like pliers, ratchet straps and even tape measure;
- How to fix bathroom stuff, from an unclogged sink to changing a shower head;
- How to bake basic foods;
Besides these necessary things, Rob has also uploaded videos where he chats with his subscribers and talks about attitude, integrity and other kinds of dad stuff. He also makes storytime videos for young children. Rob also wrote a book with practical “Dadvice” for everyday tasks.
Why is it so important?
Growing up without one of the parents can have much bigger consequences and, in the long run, leave children with psychological scars and lacking important character features. A father’s involvement in the child’s life is related to better emotional, academic, social and behavioural outcomes. In other words, growing up next to a loving father can make children become more confident and responsible as adults.
On the other hand, the mother’s presence also plays an important role in a child’s development, from social, emotional and cognitive independence. Receiving love and support from both parents is considered to create a balanced grown-up who knows their values and can offer the same affection to partners and future children.
What are the consequences of growing up without a father?
Even if the presence of a dad is crucial in the child’s first years of living, in adolescence, the implications of a father’s actions are what shape the future adult. The consequences of the father’s absence can lead to the kid to be:
- Struggling with their emotions due to compromised physical and emotional security;
- Experiencing behavioural problems by creating an intimidating persona to disguise their resentments;
- Excluded from school or having poor academic performances;
- More prone to homelessness, mental health disorders and physical health problems;
There’s also the weight on mothers who need to provide for their children, but sometimes they are unable to. Plus, single mothers are often exposed to medical negligence at birth, leaving children with head trauma, nerve injuries and even skeletal injuries. For this matter, mothers can make a paediatric compensation claim in the UK to pay for the recovery treatments and restore their emotional health after such distress.
What about living without a mother?
Although it might be considered less occurring to grow up without a mother, it is still happening. Most of the time, children can be more connected to their mothers, as they feed and take care of them more, and not experiencing this motherly nurture can make children:
- Have a low-stress tolerance, exposing them to various psychological disorders due to emotional vulnerability;
- Become unstable and aggressive, leading to social issues;
- Lose the ability to pursue healthy relationships;
- Seek attention to feel loved and appreciated;
How can you be a great father?
Becoming a good father that is able to ensure stability, love, and support isn’t easy, especially when you have also experienced the absence of your father (or both parents). It might be that you also need support before starting your own family, which is admirable. The YouTuber we talked about is the best example of how you can be a good father figure and make this world better, even if your life experience wasn’t that pleasant.
Although there are some basic tips you can try to work on if you wish to be a good father to your children:
- Spend as much time as possible with your kids so that you’ll create a bond of trust;
- Learn to pursue discipline with love and positive parenting. Punishment is not the way you’ll control your child, but positive guidance, calmly and fairly, is the right way;
- Try to become a role model. Kids are observers, but are also prone to copy your habits, so try to stick to healthy behaviours and activities to inspire them to adopt a good lifestyle;
- Learn to listen and talk to your child. Respect must be earned in both ways;
- Respect the other parent of your child so that you will assure your kid that you also respect the father-child relationship;
- Become interested in their passions and encourage your kid to pursue them. Each kid should be able to carve their own path in life, but they still need love and support.
Final thoughts
Becoming a parent is not an easy job. You need to take care of many things before your kid’s arrival and become more responsible and adapt your lifestyle to their birth. Finally, becoming a crucial presence in their life is what shapes good behaviour and personality. Hence, as a potential future father, remember these tips and try to implement them for the sake of your future relationships with the other parent and your kid.
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