The founders of Project Soulmate, Lori Zaslow and Jennifer Zucher, offer guys some (free!) advice on the subject they know best!
- Be positive and warm. Always smile. Do not be a downer and check out when you are not feeling chemistry, as it can come back and haunt you later. It is a small world and everybody knows everybody. Be your own PR person, because you never know if she will introduce you to her sister, cousin or friend. You always want to leave a good taste in someone’s mouth about you.
- Be present and discuss. Nothing too deep. Ask about her hobbies and interests and keep it light. Do not interrogate a woman and act like a private investigator (where are you from, what do you do for a living, etc.). Never talk about the future because it will guarantee no future. Topics to avoid: getting married, having kids or inviting her to a wedding in 6 months when you barely know each other.
- When you are having a great time, do not stay too long. No more than an hour and a half should suffice. Too long will turn into too much information and too much alcohol. Leave her desiring to see you again. Always leave on a high note. If there is a connection she will pursue you.
- Be thoughtful and initiate a plan. Most people appreciate the attention and someone that is thoughtful.
- Compliment a woman. If she looks good and smells good, tell her! Everyone wants to feel good about him or herself. Look at her eyes and not her cleavage!
- Dress casual but nice! Show that you made the extra effort to look and smell good. Don’t come in a suit, and don’t wear sneakers unless you’re going bowling.
- After a great date you can send a thank you text, but that is it! Do not smother a woman and over-pursue. No one likes desperation in a man.
- Do not drink too much. Two drink maximum! Any more, you become sloppy and no one likes that. A turn-on is someone that can hold their own and still carry on a conversation.
- Do not talk about yourself and/or work too much. Always be engaged in the conversation! Also, don’t repeatedly mention ex-girlfriends or ex-wives.
- Always pay the bill on the first date! After all, if you ask someone out, it’s only polite to get the bill!
General rule of thumb–know your target audience. Know your type in terms of looks, personality, goals, interests, etc. Do not date a partier if that is not your thing, do not date a bore if you need personality, and do not date a religious zealot if you never want to step foot in a church. You will just be wasting your time and will likely be doomed from the start. People really just do not change much!
Lori Zaslow loves a good project. Especially the kind that requires a little initiative, creativity and some serious networking. Now, if a project involves making someone happy, or perhaps making two people happy, Lori will use her expert matchmaking abilities to take on this mission! Lori had spent 12 years as an executive recruiter, most recently for the powerhouse family of companies including JBCStyle- focusing on the fashion and retail industries. With an unlimited source of energy, optimism and dedication, she has put hundreds of women and men into their dream jobs. Now it’s her time to focus this talent on connecting two people on a more personal level.
Outside of work, Lori juggles motherhood, an amazing 11 year marriage and hundreds of friendships from every life experience. Lori has formed lasting connections with everyone she’s met in life and in turn, they’ve connected her with others, and so on. Lori approaches Project Soulmate with an old-fashioned business sense. There is no substitute for face time. Relationships need to be nurtured. Honesty and integrity are important. And everyone deserves a shot.
You can follow Lori on twitter: www.twitter.com/lorizaslow
Jennifer Zucher believes she has the best job in the world – She spends her days finding people the love they deserve, and does it alongside her best friend and closest confidant. She mixes honesty and enthusiasm with keen interpersonal and negotiating skills. With a bachelor’s degree in Marketing and Management from New York University’s Stern School of Business, Jennifer mastered the Manhattan real estate landscape for over 12 years as a principal at Plaza Real Estate Group. Beginning Project Soulmate with her childhood friend feels like natural extension of that endeavor.
Jennifer’s passion for matchmaking was inspired by her obsession with asking how couples met. She has been the inciting force behind many relationships in her personal life and loves to give advice to her friends, family and most importantly her clients. Jennifer currently resides in New York City with her husband, Ron Zucher and two children. Outside of work, she is a passionate philanthropist and donates any free time to the Juvenile Diabetes Foundation.
You can follow Jennifer on twitter: www.twitter/com/jennzucher
photo courtesy of Flickr/ExperienceLA