Here’s the thing about control.
What’s more damaging to relationships: Inventing problems that don’t actually exist, or denying the existence of those that do?
“Psychologists say most people devote more energy to avoiding bad feelings than chasing good ones.
I believe them.”
Going the same direction doesn’t mean you’ll arrive together.
Boundaries are magical—as long as they are clear.
Surely, most of you have seen this famous optical illusion before. Many of us can see “both” women — the young woman facing the other direction, as well as the large-nosed old woman. But neither is “incorrect”.
First we took Husbands, and split them into two groups — Good Men and Bad Men.
The root cause of the marriage failure goes ignored or undetected.
Think of the times you were proven wrong despite feeling certain.
Even the worst marriage I could have ever imagined felt better than feeling (justified or not) abandoned at home combined with losing half of my young son’s childhood.
It was a miscalculation or a festering problem too small to notice, until everything fell apart, even when everything seemed to be functioning perfectly to the only people who could have done something about it.
Enough’ is whatever two people agree to in a relationship.
Bad News—You Don’t Get to Dictate What Matters to Other People
Men want their “man cards”. Even if it kills them.
In a life where I had to face total loss of control and influence over who got to be in my son’s and ex-wife’s lives, I was gifted a relationship where I don’t have to worry about whether they will be safe.
One minute, you’re raging. And you say or do something that falls in the “I didn’t mean it” category once regret replaces the anger.