This comment was by Paul Martinez in reference to the post – A Broken System: Fighting to be a Dad
I’ll keep it simple. I don’t try to get out of child support. I pay all the bills for medical and dental.My ex gets $1200 a month from me for 4 kids.
I recently took her back to court to get full custody of my kids. Here’s the reason why: my oldest son tells me at the age of 5 his mom took him to a party. He was molested by two men all while she was right there. I was at work that day and when my son told her about what happened she told him to never tell me or mention it again. When I did find out I immediately got him into therapy. He hasn’t been the same since.
My daughter was forced to read out loud the new court papers in front of her mom and older sister. My daughter called the police to tell them that with all the yelling and name calling she didn’t feel safe and wanted to come with me. My ex told the police she could not come with me for the night and left her there crying for me. My ex-wife’s daughter just found out she is the daughter of her step-grandfather. That revelation tore this family apart as my ex’s step dad confronted me saying they were having sex well into our marriage. Finally, my ex burned our youngest son in hot water. He had second degree burns from the waist down and needed a skin graft from his back to his legs. I see those scars every day and hate myself for not being able to save him.
With all this my ex still gets to keep the kids as the court found she is a fit mother. I have been to therapy to be a better father and person and know that I can provide the emotional stability that my ex will not. She doesn’t even have the kids full time. My parents have them all day and I visit them there but they never want me to leave.
I have been called many names by therapists and the court’s social workers as being too involved of a father. I am angry because what else do these kids need to go through before the court realizes she is not fit to have these kids. The courts already have made up their mind before I even walk in the courtroom simply because I am a father. The system is unfair to the better parent whether it be a mom or a dad.
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