As a young adult, I quickly realized that relationships were complex and ever-evolving. We all want to find our life partner and avoid years of mistakes and heartbreak in order to get there.
One way to do this is by learning from the successes (and failures) of those who’ve gone before us. In this blog post, I’m going to share some non-sexual advice about relationships couples wished someone had told them sooner!
“Trouble is part of your life, and if you don’t share it, you don’t give the person who loves you enough chance to love you enough.” — Dinah Shore
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7. Act-On What You Can Control
In any relationship, you can only control your own emotions and reactions. All too often, we try to control our partner’s behavior or feelings in order to make us feel better, but this never works out in the end.
As a result, many couples could suffer from anxiety or feelings of helplessness. Instead, focus on the things you have control over — your reactions and emotions in response to any situation.
With this approach, you can be more proactive about creating a positive relationship dynamic and working through issues as they arise. The only thing you can do is focus on yourself and make sure that you are putting in your best effort to become better than yesterday.
6. Heal Before Having Children
Having children can be one of the most rewarding experiences in life, but it can also bring a lot of added stress if you aren’t prepared. Before deciding to have children, make sure that both partners are ready and willing to take on the responsibility that comes with parenthood.
Take time to heal from any wounds caused by past relationships and make sure your emotional needs are being met before bringing another life into the world. This will help ensure a successful transition into parenthood for everyone involved.
Furthermore, take the time to educate yourself on how to be a good parent. Knowing what to expect and how to handle different situations will make parenting much smoother in the long run. As a result, you and your partner can enjoy the experience of raising a family together.
5. Question Herd Behavior
We often think that following the crowd is the right thing to do in relationships. We imitate what friends or family are doing without critically assessing whether it actually works for us. It’s essential to question the status quo and ask yourself if the things you are doing in your relationship are really making both of you happy.
For example, the word fun can be described in various ways — it depends on what works for you and your partner. Just because your friends are going to a party every weekend doesn’t mean that’s the best way to spend time together. Maybe an intimate dinner at home is more enjoyable?
It’s important to remember that relationships look different for everyone, so don’t feel pressured to fit into any one mold just because it’s popular or expected. Find out what works best for both of you, and stick with it.
4. Love Itself Can’t Justify Marriage
When it comes to marriage, love isn’t always enough. Marriage is a legal contract that requires both people to come together and work as a team. Love alone won’t be able to carry your relationship through the tough times — you need trust and commitment too.
Marriage requires having difficult conversations about:
- Finances
- Religion
- Values
- Parenting Styles
- Lifestyle choices
- Expectations
- Political Views
It’s crucial to make sure that you are both prepared for such discussions before walking down the aisle and committing yourself to someone else. Otherwise, you may find yourselves struggling with problems soon after tying the knot.
“If your love for another person doesn’t include loving yourself then your love is incomplete.” — Shannon L. Alder
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3. The Golden Age Opportunity
The ages of 15–30 are considered to be the most impactful years of every person over the long run. It is common to lose friends, form new relationships, and make critical decisions during this stage in life.
This is the time to explore what works best for you; it’s your opportunity to try various things and figure out who you are. Don’t be afraid to take risks and learn from mistakes; it’s all a part of the process.
During this time, seize every chance to become the person you want to be and gain invaluable experience that will shape your future. However, you should understand the difference between enjoying and ruining your golden years.
2. Setting Boundaries Before It’s Too Late
It is crucial to set boundaries in relationships, both platonic and romantic. Otherwise, you may end up allowing people to cross the line and disrespecting yourself without even realizing it. Be mindful of how people speak to and treat you, as well as what they expect from you.
Therefore, If someone’s behavior is making you uncomfortable, don’t be afraid to tell them that their words or actions are unacceptable. The same goes for setting emotional boundaries — if a friend or partner is consistently bringing negativity into your life, it might be time to take a step back and assess the situation.
Learning how to protect yourself emotionally will help ensure that your relationships are healthy and meaningful rather than toxic or one-sided interactions. As a result, you will be able to build meaningful connections with the people around you.
1. Don’t Take Anything For Granted
It’s easy to get complacent in relationships and take your loved ones for granted. Unfortunately, life is unpredictable, and people can change or even leave us at any given time. Therefore, it’s important to cherish the moments we share with them as if they were our last.
Take nothing for granted — show your partner how much you appreciate them every day. Spending quality time together is one way to do this, but small gestures like sending thoughtful texts or leaving encouraging notes can make all the difference too.
At the end of the day, don’t forget that relationships are precious and should be treasured. Make sure you express your love regularly so that no one ever doubts how much they mean to you. Whether it’s a hug after an argument or a conversation over breakfast, small gestures are what keep a relationship alive.
“The extent to which two people in a relationship can bring up and resolve issues is a critical marker of the soundness of a relationship.” — Henry Cloud
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The Bottom Line
The pieces of advice above are applicable to everyone, no matter their age. It is essential to learn how to set healthy boundaries and be mindful of the little moments in life.
Additionally, it is vital to make sure you’re prepared for every decision you make — whether it’s marriage or otherwise — since these decisions can have a long-term impact on your future.
So take time to think before jumping into something, and learn to appreciate each moment that comes your way!
This post was researched and inspired by these sources:
- https://markmanson.net/relationship-advice
- https://www.momjunction.com/articles/relationship-problem-quotes_00443758/
This content is for informational purposes only. It was not created to be a substitute for professional guidance, diagnosis, or treatment. Not all information might be accurate. Consider consulting with a professional or a specialist.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: Irina Rudnik on Unspash