Imagine staring at the cholesterol-filled chambers of a seemingly strong but damaged heart, while simultaneously reaching for a light switch that isn’t there, desperately grappling with the darkness as the doorknob eludes your arthritic fingers. This chamber has so entrapped you in psychological pain that you may fail to realize that you have the keys to the door.
Is it a lost cause and a beacon of futility as the seeker, espouses these words as he/she summons inner strength, shoving unexplained fears aside, refusing to be defeated by those paneless windows and boldly repeats; IF I COULD JUST REACH THAT WINDOW…?!
In our efforts to reach that window pane, are we seeking light to enhance our psychological and physical visions or are we seeking to minimize our psychological and physical pains?
Does the architectural structure of this room provide a blueprint for the inclusion of windows? Is this room structurally sound based on its foundation, or do the walls move when touched?
Maybe this is a haunted house and it is supposed to be void of windows in order to add to the eerie, ambiance of its intended structure.
Armed with this thought we may scream more loudly; IF I COULD JUST REACH THAT WINDOW…!
What, then, do we seek as we peer through the eyes of broken hearts, unfulfilled dreams, major disappointments, and paneless windows that propagate pain that lasts a lifetime?
Echoes of loneliness and sounds of glass breaking are often heard within the confines of these walls, but how can this be, there are no panes in these windows. The pain becomes almost unbearable and the silence is audibly deafening, as hearts bleed profusely, but how can this be, there is no blood insight?
Residing in a room filled with darkness, while sitting on a stool within this same room where the light is shining so brightly it is almost blinding, we put our hands over our foreheads, with squinting eyes to shield the glare of the light, we reposition the window curtains and pull the drawstrings to heighten the window blinds to obtain a clearer view, blindly and willfully, relinquishing our self-worth while giving, unbridled, power to this window without panes.
We hand over this power and smolder in the pain, as we fail to see our own strength and repeatedly question ourselves with; what if’s and why me, sometimes unknowingly contributing to this inner bleeding as we continue looking for a window that has no panes, searching for a door that has no knobs, allowing our hearts to be robbed as the flames of despair continue to be fanned, allowing ourselves to be reduced to ash.
Am I a window without panes or am I a relationship undiscovered?
Melvin “Casey” Lars ©
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