By Button Poetry
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Asia Samson, performing the poem “Walking Constellation”
Transcript provided by YouTube:
00:03
every year there are roughly 130 million
00:07
babies in 150 billion stars born in the
00:11
entire known universe in a span of nine
00:14
years my wife and I had three known
00:17
miscarriages all that to say we spend a
00:22
lot of time drifting in the empty void
00:23
of space wondering why the numbers never
00:26
stacked in our favor when we finally
00:29
caught the comet the geneticist saw the
00:31
hundred tiny birthmarks that freckled my
00:34
son’s entire body and told us this was a
00:36
symptom of neurofibromatosis a rare
00:39
genetic condition that can cause benign
00:41
tumors to grow in the brain spinal cord
00:43
and nerves at its worst so many tumors
00:46
can grow it can psych his skin and make
00:48
his face look like it’s melting and I’m
00:50
wondering how will I handle the tumors
00:52
if they come if I can’t even stand to
00:54
look at the birthmarks that are already
00:56
there fast forward four years it’s his
00:59
first day of school and he’s throwing a
01:00
tantrum because I’m making him wear a
01:02
hoodie in this 90 degree weather but I
01:04
can’t tell him I’m trying to hide the
01:06
spots it’s just I know too well people’s
01:08
tendency to be cruel how they like to
01:10
chop down trees just to make more
01:12
handles to mount their axe and I won’t
01:14
let him get whittled down by sharp
01:15
tongues like that watching them take
01:17
from him and turn him into something
01:19
that he’s not until he slowly becomes
01:21
the weapon that’s turning on himself I
01:22
know too well that kind of self-hate and
01:25
right now I’m just doing my best to
01:27
control the fate of what’s meant to
01:29
become of my son so please just put this
01:31
hoodie on because you can’t yet see your
01:33
birthmarks for what they truly are but
01:35
just then while standing there naked he
01:37
held up his arms and said daddy they
01:39
look like stars then pointing to the
01:42
biggest one on his ribs he said daddy
01:43
this one looks like a spaceship so
01:46
forgive me for failing to compose myself
01:48
when he started making up stories about
01:49
the spaceship flying through the galaxy
01:51
that is his body
01:52
have I forgotten how much energy it
01:54
takes to create a planet have I
01:56
forgotten about the black hole that can
01:58
suck the life out of an empty room have
02:00
I forgotten about the empty space that
02:01
was left behind after the first time I
02:03
dismantled the unused crib in our
02:05
bedroom how dare me think I know more
02:07
about this universe than you do how dare
02:10
me forget about all the stars to fizzle
02:12
out before you came shining through you
02:13
were born you are here riddled with
02:16
spots as proof
02:17
exist is why they call them birthmarks
02:19
to begin with so how lucky are we that
02:21
you have more than most miracle boy I
02:23
know one day you might want to eclipse
02:25
yourself into that hoodie to hide behind
02:27
the moon as they starin point will let
02:29
them stare in point the same way they
02:31
stare in pointed stars in wonder and awe
02:33
remind them they are merely specks of
02:36
dust in the vastness of your presence
02:37
and when the bullies come with a meteor
02:39
shower of insults aiming to hit you at
02:42
your core
02:42
swing your Milky Way arm to the bridge
02:44
of their nose so they will always know
02:46
that you are the Big Bang your mother
02:48
and I have been waiting for you walking
02:50
constellation you Lightspeed traveller
02:52
your rocket of hope I’ve gone on with
02:55
this metaphor for too long I know but
02:57
every year there are roughly 130 million
03:01
babies and 150 billion stars born in the
03:04
entire known universe all that to say no
03:08
matter how worse your condition becomes
03:11
we will always love you until infinity
03:13
you are our Sun our one in 150 billion
03:27
you
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This post was previously published on YouTube and is republished here under a Creative Commons license.
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Photo credit: Screenshot from video