While different learning styles are nothing new, there’s a difference between how a child learns and how their brain actually thinks. Neurodivergence is becoming a stronger topic of conversation as more parents are getting their children properly diagnosed. Whether your child recently received a diagnosis or you think they may be neurodivergent, it’s important to know what you should do to support and encourage them.
Many people only associate neurodiversity with autism. While that’s a common disorder, neurodivergent children may also experience symptoms of ADHD or dyslexia. Neuro-differences are categorized similarly to other social categories, and children can fall somewhere on a spectrum depending on the way they think and the behaviors they display.
So, if your child thinks differently than their peers, what can you do to be their strongest support system? Let’s cover a few ideas that will help and encourage you both.
Educate Yourself
One of the best things you can do to be an advocate for your child is to educate yourself on what it means to be neurodivergent. Far too often, conditions like autism and ADHD are stereotyped. You might think you know the common symptoms, but your child might not experience all of them.
How you think and feel about your child’s diagnosis will make a big difference in your ability to encourage them. A lot of it is about perspective. Instead of thinking that variations in the brain are deficits, consider them normal – just different. When you adopt that perspective, you’re more likely to adopt the principles of neurodiversity. The more people who feel the same way, the easier it will be for neurodivergent individuals to feel more welcome in traditional environments. When you know what it means to be neurodivergent and you understand there is no one correct way for the brain to be, you’ll become a built-in advocate for your child’s future. You’ll spend more time focusing on how their brain naturally works, rather than trying to change or “fix” it in some way.
Establish Healthy Routines
Having a routine in place can be beneficial for everyone. Routines help to reduce stress, provide familiarity, and can offer a sense of comfort. Those benefits are tenfold for neurodivergent children.
Structure at home will greatly reduce stress in your child and can help them to succeed. While your child’s routine will depend on the needs of your household, use the following as a basic outline to get started.
- Set a specific wake-up time each day.
- Let your child know what their day holds.
- Create rewards for good behavior.
- Encourage independent behavior.
- Set goals for your child to help them stick to their routine.
Not only will a healthy routine help to make things easier for your child, but they’ll also feel more empowered. That’s a skill they can take with them into adulthood, and it can even make situations outside of their routine more comfortable. For example, not every day will be the same.
Sometimes, your child will go to a birthday party or be around family members at a holiday gathering. While you should still consider your child’s needs during these events (especially if they have sensory issues), establishing independence and growth through a regular routine can help them succeed when something different comes along.
Reach Out for Help
If you’re the father of a neurodivergent child, there’s no question you have a lot on your plate. Thankfully, you don’t have to do it alone. It’s important to build a community around you and your child that you can turn to for support. You can’t pour from an empty cup, and there will be times you need to focus on your own self-care to be the best possible father for your child.
With that in mind, don’t hesitate to reach out to people like:
- Family members
- Close friends
- Teachers/school administrators
- Support groups
More often than not, the people in your life will be more than willing to help you with the raising of your child, whether it’s so you can experience a few hours of rest or because they understand how neurodivergent minds work and can help your child to find more success.
Don’t feel like you aren’t supporting your child if you aren’t able to be there every second. By building a community, you’ll boost their independence and show them that they can rely on others for help – not just you. Again, that’s a skill they can take with them forever, and it will make it easier for them to ask for help or clarification on things well into adulthood.
Your neurodivergent child doesn’t have anything “wrong” with them. They simply think differently than others. They’ll look to you for consistent support, and it’s crucial that you know how to give it. So, make sure you’re looking at things from a positive perspective, and encourage your child the best way you know how.
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