Always searching and searching for that father figure I never had.
–––
Fatherless
by Ivori Wyche
My life is filled with the deaths of loved ones.
I try to grasp it all, understand.
Sometimes I ask, “Why me? Did I do something wrong?”
With each death, I grow more numb,
First my dad, next my uncle,
more recently my brother.
I have grown up without the father I’ve always needed.
I let the simple-minded boys run in and out of my life,
Always searching and searching for that father figure I never had.
My anger rises.
I return to my fifth grade graduation.
I search the crowd.
I see him.
He’s here!
In back.
Standing tall.
Like an NBA center.
Wearing his butter-colored Timberlands
But,
No.
My imagination tricked me.
He wasn’t here.
I stood frozen
Then let it all go.
Fine to cry in front of others
Who cared what they thought?
I stood, still there fatherless,
Destroyed.
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