I am (fill in the blank) are the most important words. Because what you tell yourself and say to others, you eventually become. You receive from the world the energy you give off. You reveal messages in your non-verbal cues.
We all get busy and forget to feed ourself healthy words. What are you telling yourself these days? The 8 “I Am” statements in bold are the ones you want to repeat to yourself.
List of “I AM…”
1. I am happy.
Defeatist Attitude: self-pity, mourning. You’re saying: I’m not content or fulfilled.
2. I’m fulfilled.
Defeatist Attitude: wanting more. You’re saying: I don’t have enough.
3. I am calm.
Defeatist Attitude: angry or anxious. You’re saying: I’m not in control with the things I can or can’t change.
4. I am at peace with my life.
Defeatist Attitude: not settled. You’re saying: I’m not in control with the things I can or can’t change.
5. I am loved.
Defeatist Attitude: fear. You’re saying: I’m not worthy.
6. I am beautiful or handsome.
Defeatist Attitude: feeling ugly or unnoticeable. You’re saying: I’m not desirable.
7. I am successful.
Defeatist Attitude: feeling unsuccessful and not where you want to be. You’re saying: I’m not lucky, and not doing enough or talented enough.
8. I am strong.
Defeatist Attitude: feeling weak and vulnerable. You’re saying: I can be defeated if problems come my way.
Change Your Hurtful Self-Talk
If you are saying to yourself that conditions have to happen first in order for you to be the “I am _____” you desire, then you may be making excuses, giving up control, or allowing your power to be taken unnecessarily away.
Examples:
I am strong if I’m popular, famous, or attractive.
Self-Talk Message: I’m dependent on people to make me happy
Replace with: I have everything inside me for my happiness.
I am beautiful if others compliment me.
Self-Talk Message: I rely on others to boost my self-esteem.
Replace with: I’m beautiful inside and out.
I am loved if someone loves me.
Self-Talk Message: I rely on others to determine my self-worth.
Replace with: I am loved.
I am at peace with my life if my thoughts are peaceful ones or if I’m in control.
Self-Talk Message: Anxiety and worry are a part of my life.
Replace with: I am whole and situations can’t change my peace.
I am calm if I’m not restricted by what I can do from the economy, my health, or my boss.
Self-Talk Message: I’m dependent on situations.
Replace with: I have peace and hope no matter what happens.
I’m fulfilled if I have the stuff that will make me happy.
Self-Talk Message: I let things define my identity.
Replace with: No thing completes me. I complete me.
I’m happy if I have a good day, run into good luck and situations go as planned.
Self-Talk Message: I need a perfect life to be happy.
Replace with: I need good and bad days. I enjoy the good days, and let go of the bad days as they make me appreciate the good days.
So much of our self-talk can hurt us. We’re feeding our minds what we need to meet expectations, when we could be more successful if we have no or low expectations.
If you’re blindsided by a situation, that’s because you had an expectation going in that couldn’t be met.
If you unexpectedly lost a job or relationship with no expectations, then you’d observe the unfolding of happenings as though they are a part of life and just accept them without judgment.
When you don’t accept the situation for what it is, this slows your progress and moving on. When you do get caught up and realize what’s happening, if it happens all of the sudden or over time where you could’ve seen clues, asking yourself why the situation happened, won’t usually help you.
The question can confuse you as you analyze scratching your head. With no answers, your productivity is delayed.
Shutting a door no matter how or why, allows for breakthroughs and your allowing better opportunities to manifest.
If your dream is in the opposite direction, you have to head that way in order to get closer. You may not know what that looks like now, but facing uncertainty unlocks the key. Accept the not knowing.
Your current life situation may look nothing like what you hope your destiny or dream turns into. You would be best served to look for the golden nugget in your current situation and how your growth could be used today and possibly tomorrow.
You could be learning patience, courage, or how to speak a language because you’ll need those skills soon, otherwise you would be working on something else.
Imagine Your Life as a World Map
Imagine your life laid out on a world map. You may actually want to pull out a physical map for fun, or if you have a tough time with imagination.
The map could be a globe or a paper map. You may want to magnify the area you’ve spent most your life in (if you print a map from online). You want to have stickers or markers handy. I recommend green stars, red circles, and yellow triangles.
You can start with marking or pasting green stars everywhere positive you visited, as you learned and gained experiences in those places (good experiences, vacation, jobs, and relationships). You paste red circles at every negative place (places of trials, dead ends, and hurts). If you’ve moved on and have been healed in those places, place a green star sticker on top of the red sticker. Those places grew you productively.
Next, you paste a yellow triangle in any transitional or stepping stone experience (job, relationships, health issue). This could have a red or green marking underneath.
After you thought of every situation year by year, look at your map. Your map can look like a busy life, an organized mess, or like graffiti art (depending on how you perceive). Each person’s map would look different, but has all three colors woven into their life.
The map you made is your unique life that no one else has.
The incomplete journey is leading you to your future passion, purpose, and destiny. You’re developing your skills and building your character needed to support your ultimate destiny that will give you fulfillment, happiness, and life’s meaning.
If your destiny is a relationship or vocational calling, you need all the experiences you acquired from all the places you visited and lived, that you can be reminded of from memories, photos, or people you know.
No matter where you physically end up on the life map, the purpose is to be a better person to yourself and the world.
You do this by taking yourself along the journey with all your “I AM’s” and authentic truths you have or transformed in yourself. When you finish, I AM who I AM can be your self-discovery statement. No additional words need to be added.
Starting with just two powerful words, you have amassed depth and internal wealth with your wisdom and lessons learned. You know who you are. And nothing can take that from you. No situation or person.
You remain solid, strong and resilient. And never fall backwards. You don’t need additional stickers or colors for who you’ve powerfully become, as represented by all the stickers and colors on your map. Those are the scars and the victories you’ve experienced.
Just something to aspire to even during the storms and winds.
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Previously published on medium
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