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We like eating food we know isn’t healthy because we’re human.
That is, because we’re emotional.
That is, because we get emotional and don’t know how to deal with it properly.
That is, because we get emotional and don’t know how to deal with it properly and so we pick an extremely easy, non-confrontational way to deal with it…
Food.
Whether we’re feeling down, lonely, bored, stressed, or whatever it is getting us down….many of us turn to food.
You’re going to “treat” yourself to something sugary, or something you know is a poor choice, because these are the things that soothe those feelings.
Well, I say soothe. Numb is probably more accurate.
This will only stop when you start to become mindful about your eating habits.
Before you make a poor choice—that is, a choice you know, deep down, you don’t really want to make—catch yourself. Just don’t make the choice, for now, and see what happens.
I guarantee you’ll learn something. Like, you know, the actual reason you’re choosing to eat food that’s bad for your health even when you’d like to make a healthy choice you can be proud of.
Obviously, this is not easy. The impulse is to eat something sugary, the thing you’re used to eating, the thing that gives you a strong hit. And, honestly, it’s easier to not be mindful. It’s easier to just eat the sugary thing. It’s easier to just keep doing what you’re doing and never change.
But… is it?
I mean, you’re reading this for a reason. Some part of you wants to change. Some part of you is tired of not being mindful of your choices because not being mindful of your choices has led you to where you are right now: a place you don’t want to be.
I’d like to introduce you to one of my clients, Matt.
He signed up for 1-to-1 coaching a few months ago now, and, well, here’s what he had to say about what he learned about himself and his relationship with food.
“I’d often come home from basketball, or be stressed and tired from work, and I’d use that as an excuse to just eat a load of crap. Which, in my case, was a load of sugar. Cookies, cakes, sweets, chocolate. Sometimes I’d literally eat an entire bag of cookies, a few cakes, a big bag of sweets, and a whole bar of chocolate.
And I’d keep going until I was way past full. I’d just eat until I felt sick, pretty much. And even then, sometimes, I’d just keep going because I needed more and more of that instant high.
I didn’t seem to be able to stop. But then part of me also didn’t want to stop, which was confusing.
I guess I just felt out of control. These binging episodes held complete power over me. And I knew it wasn’t sustainable. Was I just going to do this for the rest of my life? What about when I had a wife and kids? Would I still do it then?
I didn’t want to be the person I was being. Not anymore. So that’s when I knew I had to do something…even though, yes, I’m a fairly busy guy. But busyness could forever be an excuse.
Sending photos of every meal to my coach helped me make healthy choices, even when, being totally honest, I didn’t want to. There were plenty of times when I wanted to binge and just eat crap, and I’d even be pissed off that I “couldn’t.” BUT, afterward, I’d always feel empowered and happy that I’d made a healthy choice.
Always.
At the beginning of Week 4, I really felt like I’d hit a turning point.
Everything just seemed… easier. It wasn’t even like I was trying to make healthy choices anymore. It was like healthy living and healthy eating was just what I did. It was just who I was. I started to value eating healthily over any kind of short-term sugar “fix” or “high.” I got a kick out of eating healthily and knowing that I could’ve chosen to eat a load of crap, but didn’t.
To be clear: it’s not like I never got tempted. I’m still a human being. But the temptations didn’t seem as manic as they did before. They didn’t take a hold of me like they perhaps used to. They just seemed to be there, and I just seemed to acknowledge them. But then I’d sort of smile and think, no, I want to keep this thing going. I’m going to make a healthy choice and I’m going to be proud of that, rather than “giving in” to temptation and inevitably feeling bad about myself.
I should also be clear that I had a few cheat meals. And that’s a cheat meal, not a cheat day, by the way. And having a cheat meal every now and again has been fascinating, because—especially the last couple of times—I haven’t felt any desire to then go and binge. None whatsoever. It’s almost like I’m actually still investing in the process of mastering my diet by having a cheat meal because these cheats are planned. They’re a night off and nothing more, and they actually make me look forward to getting back to eating healthily. They sort of…reset me, I guess. In the best possible way.
I mean, I lost 20 pounds in 6 weeks without even trying to lose weight, so that’s definitely a big one. I also look better. Apparently, I have cheekbones. I have more energy. I feel better about myself. I’m clearer in mind. I’m more motivated.
But I suppose these are the benefits I expected. There are others I didn’t expect.
For example, I feel massively more extroverted. I’ve discovered how much I love people and how much I love interacting with people, sharing, flirting, having banter, listening, asking questions, laughing together. That surprised me, and pleasantly so.
The biggest one, overall, is that I feel more like myself. I feel more ME. I don’t know how else to describe it. I really think my poor diet and binging on sugar seemingly all the time were stopping me from being me. Which they were because doing them meant I was sabotaging myself. I feel like, through not eating sugar and eating three healthy meals a day, every day, I’ve been able to get out of my own way and start really becoming the person I knew I could eventually become.
I know. It sounds crazy. How can this have happened just from me, essentially, cutting out sugary stuff and eating three healthy meals a day?
I think it’s because mastering your diet is about a whole lot more than just food.
It’s about mindset. It’s about patience and persistence. It’s about the beauty and terror and burden and responsibility and privilege of having a choice, and then making one that serves you as opposed to one that doesn’t. It’s about trusting the process over desiring immediate results.
Really, it’s you vs. you. The you that’s holding you back vs. the you that you want to (and know you can) become.
Holding back is easier, I guess because we’re used to it. It’s familiar, even if it’s not comfortable. It’s simpler to not exert effort. But doing something to become the person you know you can be is more worth it than maybe anything else in this world. It’s hard, obviously. It takes effort, but man…I feel just incredible. Better than ever, I’d say. And the longer I’m on this journey, the more unbreakable I feel.”
I chose to highlight Matt’s journey because there are highs and lows. Failures and triumphs. Very difficult parts and very easy parts.
I chose to highlight his journey because it’s real. Because maybe you can relate to it. Maybe you can feel less hopeless and more understood.
Because I want you to know exactly what it takes to go from where you are now to who you want to be.
Because I want you to know that Matt isn’t special. (Sorry, bro. Love you.)
Because I want you to know that you’re just like him.
Because I want you to know that you can become just like him.
You know, if you want.
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