My son is 8 (almost 9), and has not yet discovered my online writing. Perhaps he never will. (It’s not like I’m famous.) But either way, I’m sure he won’t mind me writing about how cool I think he is.
Maybe you’re thinking cringe, right? A dad writing about how great his child is. How original. As if no other parent in the history of writing has praised their offspring. It seems like an obvious one, no?
But honestly, I’m not just writing this because he’s my kid, or I want him to like me more. (He seems okay with me for the most part.) I am simply in awe at how he is growing mentally and emotionally, and the ways he handles himself through tough times.
He weathered the storm like a well-adjusted adult, while many “grown-ups” around us fell to pieces.
Most recently, as you know, we all went through a pandemic together. As many of you parents know, it was a constant juggling act of trying to stay afloat financially while ensuring your kid got some kind of education. Our awesome government (sarcasm) in Ontario kept flip-flopping between in-person and online school, so we had to keep adjusting our schedule. I get that the virus was a moving target, but the constant changes wore on our mental health.
Meanwhile, my kid wore a mask to school, and followed the rules without causing a fuss. While he didn’t love online school (I’m sure many teachers can agree), he did his best.
But it’s more than just his calm under stress.
He has the gift of making friends wherever he goes. He no doubt got this trait from his mom, who has quite a network of pals in our neighbourhood. I’m the one that maintains just two or three friendships, but then again many middle-aged men are this way.
Part of it could be that he’s an only child. He doesn’t have to fight for attention, and he’ll never feel second best. Maybe his drive for friendship is because he’s stuck with his parents most of the time, and we’re fun, but like… old fun. Y’know?
He wants kid friends that can run after him (or be chased by him.) He wants friends who can plant themselves in his fantasy world on a dime, without questioning the validity.
Speaking of imagination, his blows my mind. He narrates the thoughts in his head often, spinning elaborate tales. Admittedly I find it hard to keep up sometimes due to the noise in my head, but he knows that. He knows I want to listen to him.
He can also draw quite well — maybe I’ll take credit for this one, although my partner also has artistic skill. During the pandemic we discovered Perler beads together, and he helped stoke my own imagination.
Oh, and speaking of artsy things, he can dance. I have a video of him when he was like 4, grooving to The Chemical Brothers. I have no idea where he got his dance moves from — maybe his mother? — but they’re pretty good. I would show you that video, but I don’t want to give him a shock if he finds this article on his own.
He just ‘gets it’.
Recently, he’s been watching a lot of science shows. He knows more about the universe than I do already. Mind you, scientists also know more than when I was his age — but he’s absorbing it all. He’s all cool one moment, flipping his hair, and the next he’s telling someone about Class M stars.
He’s also a gamer. He’s better at video games than I ever was. He watches his gamer bros on Youtube, and learns all their tricks. At this point he could probably have his own channel, but he’s in no hurry to get famous. He’s too cool for that.
I don’t want to praise him too much in case he sees this and gets all big-headed. He already knows he’s cool, that’s the thing. He doesn’t need anyone to tell him.
Did I mention he is fluent in sarcasm? He has a firm grasp on what’s okay to say and do in various situations, and what’s not. He already makes better dad jokes than I do (not that the bar is very high.)
He exudes self-confidence, even when faced with the (few) mean kids he’s dealt with so far. It doesn’t seem to rattle him. Actually, he has ended up making friends with some of them. He makes friends with just about anyone.
Oh, and he wears his hair long, and doesn’t give a heck what your opinion is of that. (I am also jealous of his hair, having once had it.)
Maybe you’re rolling your eyes if you’re still reading. Maybe you think my bias is overwhelmingly on display. Maybe you’re right. However, coming from someone who was also cool about 35 years ago, I know cool when I see it.
Am I really jealous of my kid? Well, I mean, I am at the age of a mid-life crisis when I reflect on my younger versions. But I’m mostly just proud of this child I had a part in making.
He’s the best parts of me staring back at myself — except cooler. Way cooler.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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