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Future NBA Hall of Famer Kobe Bryant said that the path to becoming greater than you know yourself to be “is as much about fear as it is love.” So does fear make you greater than you are? Along with Kobe, I would like to think that my fear arises as I discover the greater than within myself. That voice in my head screams, “I can’t be that! There’s no fucking way!”
My profound fear is getting what I have to give up to become my greater than self. Inevitably, my self-doubt emerges in my bold surrender to the greater within me. My self-doubt wishes to preserve the ‘older’ version of Jon. That voice in my head says, “I can’t do that!”
I give that up and surrender to the unknown: “What do I have to give up to be my greater than self?”
Reinvention, becoming greater than you know yourself to be is scary; it’s inherent chaos. It’s discarding your old version for the unknown. I fear: “Who will I become?” “Will I like that version of me?”
There are the upside and the downside in reinventing you. Given the choice: I’d choose sameness. I’d choose no change. It’s predictable. It’s safe. It’s comfortable. Yet, in reinvention is the possibility of surprise. Reinvention is the possibility of redefining life. Really, we don’t know what we shall become anyway. The beauty of life in its imperfection, in taking a risk.
As I trained for black belt many years ago, my friend Bobby told me, “It’s your time to get yelled at.” No, that was not fun. I sucked it up, and made Shodan. With my therapist Lance, I looked at my unresolved childhood fears causing me suffering in the present. That was truly frightening. And I did it.
I endure for greater than I know myself to be. It ain’t easy. Often the things that make a profound difference aren’t anyway.
It’s the love of those who believe in you that inspire you to endure, to persevere for greater than you know you to be. Really love inspires reinvention—your recreation of yourself. That’s what Kobe reminds about love on the journey of becoming greater than. Accept the love of others as you pursue your reinvention as greater than you know you to be.
The greater than journey reveals my fears. That’s by design. On the surface, the greater than path occurs as singular, as isolated. Ultimately, it’s not. My greater than arises out of my communities, the people I love, who love me back too. We create each other in community.
What’s in your heart counts, makes a difference. Those you believe in, and those who believe in you source you becoming greater than you know yourself to be. They give you faith in yourself to endure the journey.
That was Sensei Dan for me. That’s my Brothers John and John. That’s Mom. That’s Lance. That’s Bobby. No one pursues the greater than journey alone. Invite and be open to the participation of others, who believe in you.
Who are those who believe in you? Who are your communities? Community is your source of power on the path of becoming greater than we know.
I may never achieve my greater than self. Yet, who am I to say? I continue the journey with grace and gratitude for the ones, who always walk beside me. Fear doesn’t make you greater. Love does.
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