Wondering if that special someone secretly loves you, even if they’ve never said it? Here are some ways to find out.
They can’t take their eyes off of you
When you walk into a room, they light up. Even if they were in a bad mood, they’ll be in good spirits again.
They can’t stop smiling around you. You catch them staring at you. The shy ones will quickly look away when you catch them. Still, they can’t stop sneaking glances at the face they love.
When you are having a conversation with them, they will make a lot of eye contact. They want to gaze in your eyes because you are the most amazing person ever to them. They will be so mesmerized by you, they will even ignore their cell phone.
When you are both having a conversation in a group, they focus on you a lot. And if they tell a joke to people, they will glance over back at you to see if you laughed at it. Your reaction matters to them.
They want to protect you.
They will always have your back. They never want to see you hurt.
If you are walking near a busy road, they will walk on the outside of you closest to the street to keep you safe.
If someone is arguing with you, they will be the first to defend you, and take your side.
When you’re sick, they will be right by your side, bringing you tissues, cooking soup for you, or running to the pharmacy for your medicine and grabbing your favorite take out to bring home.
When you’re seriously ill they will never want to leave your side. They’ll stay with you while you are hospitalized so you won’t be alone.
They’ll take off their jacket and give it to you when you’re freezing outside, and hold an umbrella over your head to protect you from the rain. If you leave a restaurant in bad weather, they’ll make you stay warm inside while they run out in torrential rain to get the car to pick you up.
They’ll find reasons to be close to you.
When you’re walking with them, they will lightly bump into you. That’s no accident. They just want to be close to you. They’ll touch your arm frequently when they’re talking with you. They’ll always find excuses to stand or sit next to you, and will offer you a shoulder to cry on if you need it.
When you’re dating, they will want to hold your hand and will randomly stroke a hair out of your eye. They’ll straighten your tie, pull lint off of your clothes — any excuse for contact. They’ll sit close to you, just to be near you.
When the evening ends, they will pull you in their arms. You will know their true feelings through their kiss. There will be no doubt in your mind that they love being close to you.
They go out of their way for you.
When they love you, they will go out of their way for you.
Need a ride to the airport? No problem. They’ll drive you there at night in the rain. If they find out you ran out of your favorite coffee, they will volunteer to make a trip to the store and pick it up for you.
They’ll learn how to make your favorite recipe when they never even cooked before because they want to make you happy.
Do you like romantic comedies and they hate them? They may even go see one with you. Are you a football enthusiast and your partner doesn’t even know what a touchdown is? They will buy you tickets to the championship game for your birthday and go with you.
They’ll take off work for a day trip to the ocean with you. They’ll ditch their friends to meet your family.
Only someone who loves someone will go out of their way for them.
They remember the small details you told them.
They remember your favorite ice cream flavor and surprise you with it. They know what your favorite color is, and what your allergies are. They know your favorite singer and will surprise you with tickets.
And they will remember that your father left when you were a child what your brother’s name is, and the names of all the people you don’t get along with at work.
When they love you they are interested in your life and truly pay attention to what you say. They care.
They honor their commitments to you.
A person who loves you is not going to want to cancel plans with you. If they make a promise to you, they keep it. They will not tell you they are now too tired to go out with you, or their friend needs them for something. They value and cherish the time they spend with you because you are important to them. Your time together is a priority.
There are exceptions here. If they have a real family crisis, or they are running a fever and too ill to move, they will cancel your plans, but reluctantly. They’ll feel just as disappointed as you are. And they will always suggest a day to reschedule.
If they tell you they’ll call, they will. They will never be vague about it. And you won’t ever find yourself wondering where they are, because they’ll always let you in on their schedule.
They will value their time with you and respect you.
They include you in the future.
Someone who loves you will want you around in their future with them. They’ll make definite and consistent plans with you to go on dates. They’ll schedule Facetime sessions with you during the pandemic, and go on day trips and vacations with you when possible.
Here’s an example: When someone asks you to commit to an event that’s happening six months from now, you know they see you with them in their future.
And if they start teasing you about how you’ll both look when you are old and gray, and what your kids will look like someday, then they are truly smitten.
People can tell you all kinds of things. They’ll tell you you’re beautiful (or handsome), they’ll say they love you, but they won’t even show up when you are in need. Romantic are words are great, but backed up with action — that’s when it really means something. If your partner hasn’t told you yet but is showing those secret signs above, then they are a keeper. Congratulations! You’ve found your person.
This post was previously published on Medium.com.
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