Most people have been through a breakup at some point in their lives. They can be incredibly painful, and it often feels like we are going through them all over again.
This blog post will discuss the five stages of a breakup: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. We will talk about what each stage entails and how to get through them as quickly as possible.
“Life always waits for some crisis to occur before revealing itself at its most brilliant.” — Paulo Coelho
Part I: The Stages
Denial
Denial is the first stage of a breakup. It is when we are in shock and cannot believe that this is happening. We may try to convince ourselves that it is not accurate or that there is still a chance that things will work out. This is often a short-lived stage, as reality eventually sets in.
For instance, you may find yourself going through your partner’s things, looking for anything that could prove that they still love you. Or, you may call them repeatedly, hoping that they will pick up the phone and tell you it was all a mistake.
If you find yourself in denial, it is vital to give yourself time to grieve. Cry if you need to, talk to your friends and family about what happened, and allow yourself to feel the pain. Trying to bottle up your emotions will only worsen them in the long run.
Anger
The second stage of a breakup is anger. This can be a very destructive emotion if not channeled correctly. We may be angry at our ex, ourselves, or even the world. We may say and do things that we later regret. It is important to remember that this too shall pass and to try to stay calm during this time.
Furthermore, try to avoid lashing out at your ex. This will only make the situation worse and prolong the healing process. If you need to, write down your thoughts and feelings in a journal or talk to a therapist. Talking to someone who can offer impartial advice can be very helpful during this difficult time.
Another way anger might express itself is by blaming yourself for the breakup. You might think, “if only I had done this,” or “I should have seen this coming.” It’s important to remember that breakups are almost always caused by both parties, and it takes two people to make a relationship work.
Bargaining
The third stage of a breakup is bargaining. This is when we try to make deals with ourselves or our ex in order to get them back. For example, we may promise to change our behavior or go to counseling.
We may also find ourselves repeatedly going over what happened in our heads, trying to figure out where things went wrong. It is important not to dwell on the past instead of focusing on the present.
Making deals with your ex will only set you up for disappointment. They have already made their decision, and no amount of bargaining will change that. If you find yourself doing this, it is crucial to take a step back and remember what they did that led to the breakup in the first place. Would you really want to get back together with someone who is capable of that?
Depression
Depression is when the reality of the situation sinks in, and we are left feeling empty and alone. We may have trouble eating, sleeping, or doing our daily activities.
This is often considered the most challenging stage to get through, but patience is essential. The pain will eventually fade, and you will be able to move on with your life. In the meantime, try to stay busy and surround yourself with positive people. Talking to a therapist can also be very helpful during this time.
In addition, it is vital to avoid making any major life decisions during this stage. This includes moving, changing jobs, or getting into another relationship. These decisions are often made to fill the void left by the breakup, but there is a possibility that it might only make you feel worse in the long run.
Acceptance
The final stage of a breakup is acceptance. This is when we come to terms with what happened and can move on with our lives. We may still have days where we feel sad or angry, but we have accepted the situation and are no longer struggling.
If you find yourself stuck in any of these stages, it is crucial to seek professional help. A therapist can assist you in working through your emotions and moving on from the breakup.
Breakups are never easy, but by understanding the grieving process, you can make things less stressful for yourself. Remember that this too shall pass, and eventually, you will be able to move on with your life.
The Bottom Line
No one said that breakups are easy. They are, however, a part of life. By understanding the five stages of a breakup, you can make the process less difficult for yourself.
If you find yourself struggling to get through these stages, it is important to seek professional help. A therapist can assist you in working through your emotions and moving on from the breakup.
“Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.” — Marilyn Monroe
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This post was previously published on MEDIUM.COM.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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