50% of marriages end in divorce. Out of the half that stay together, 1/3 report being happy, 1/3 are “happy enough” and the other 1/3 are miserable. We actively plan our businesses, goals, and finances, but most of us keep our marriage on auto-pilot and expect it to maintain itself. Communication breaks down, resentment builds, and the love slowly dies.
We are dedicating this month to designing our relationships with our spouses. Lance Salazar from Legendary Couples is back on the show. He has just released The Miracle Morning for Legendary Couples which he coauthored with Hal Elrod. He breaks down the 4 Elements of a Legendary Marriage for us:
- The Individual
- The Partnership
- Becoming Friends
- Becoming Lovers
Today, we talk about the first element, which is the individual. In order to be the best partners and parents, we have to work on ourselves first. Two people need to be able to stand on their own before they can love another. As a couple, spouses need to be interdependent, not codependent. Nothing is more attractive than a confident person who knows what they want and need in life. That is why, even though it sounds counterintuitive, the first step is to put the marriage on the shelf and let each person retreat in order to deal with their own baggage. Listen to how Lance and Brandy Salazar did it in this episode!
Lance Salazar’s Links
Originally published on The Good Dad Project
Photo courtesy of author