I had a teacher who always used to pay attention to words. He would take a word and break it into parts to emphasize one part of it. For instance, he would say, “When people think about responsibility, they forget it contains response… We are going to respond to God for everything we do in this life.”
Due to his lessons about words, I started to examine them in this way. Let’s take a closer look at the word relationship. We have many in this life, but none is more intimate than a loving relationship. And this is the way it should be. So, take a deeper dive into relation-ship. For this bond to be formed, there must be attraction and chemistry. Smile, good looks, shape, butterflies, electricity, a sense of humor, etc. You know, things that can be detected during the first encounter.
Secondly, and I think this is non-negotiable, there must be truthfulness. I heard this statement in a romantic movie and it’s true, “Truth is the only safe ground to stand upon.” A relationship cannot grow upon lies. Because lies cause mistrust and the ship can never sail properly if we don’t trust the person we’re sailing with.
Next, I believe two people relating to each other, should have a relationship with the Creator. Why is this important? For many reasons, but I’ll just state two. The couple should recognize that the good in their lives comes from Him. This will allow them to be grateful to Him, and gratitude is one of the keys to happiness. Also, when times get tough, and they will because it’s part of life. They will call on Him first, and then, they will support one another through those rocky waters.
Then, there are 3 things that keep the bond strong and fresh. Communication, support, and affection. The relationship never gets dull when these three things are a consistent part of the union. These are 3 of the main reasons the sparks dwindle and fizzle out among couples.
They stop talking to one another. When things start to change for the worst, the partners should be able to express themselves openly without there always being a dispute. There will be disputes, but they shouldn’t happen every time they talk about issues pertaining to the relationship. And the communication during arguments shouldn’t be about winning. They should be about understanding and learning what the other person needs going forward. Also, even arguments should contain a level of civility.
There shouldn’t be name calling, threatening to cheat, and things of that sort. Mind you, things will get heated from time to time, but after that, there should be apologizing and making up. The couple must be able to express themselves freely with one another. Let me clarify this point. I’m not talking about speaking fondly concerning past relationships and things of that sort. Let’s be realistic, we’re only human. Things like that can weaken a strong bond. What I’m talking about is sharing feelings, dreams, aspirations, and even fears with one another. This kind of opening up between the two souls helps add strength to an already loving union.
Affection. In a nutshell, they stop paying attention to each other. The romantic gestures and attention to small details take a back seat and sometimes they disappear altogether. Affection is also about generosity. Two people sharing with one another because of their care and concern for the other person. In other words, affection is about paying attention to the other person’s needs.
Support. This comes in every form one can think of. Emotional, financial, physical, mental, and spiritual support is needed for a relationship to be strong and remain that way. Support involves large and small issues. From helping with the bills, giving the other person a shoulder to cry on, and everything in between. Believe it or not, this type of sharing and support will continue to make the bond stronger.
This is just an extra reminder for couples who want to keep growing together. Don’t stop doing the sweet things for each other that you did in the beginning of the relationship. As a matter of fact, these things should increase the longer you are together. Cuddling on the couch, sharing unexpected passionate kisses, whispering with one another, making love while looking deep into each other’s eyes. I could go on, but I think you get the point.
A relationship should be just like its name. The couple should travel together as if they’re on a ship. Relating to one another with mercy, help, support, and love, whether the sailing is smooth or rocky. They should relate to one another with tenderness and affection. These matters are the waters which the relationship must sail upon. I believe I’ve said enough. But I was just thinking.
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This post was previously published on Louismorriscoaching.com.
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Photo credit: Katherine McCormack on Unsplash