Myke Macapinlac says that your values, past, and communication determine a lot about whether or not they’re the right one for you.
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Are you in a relationship and you’re wondering if it’s the right one for you?
I know exactly what you’re going through. I’ve dated women in the past and sometimes I ask myself if this is as good as it gets.
Just like most people, I’ve gone through my fair share of struggles in dating. I’ve been in situations before where I wondered “Should I stick it out or will I regret that she’ll be ‘the one that got away?'”
Finding a congruent significant other is one of the most important decisions you’ll ever make. How do you know when you’ve found yourself a catch?
Here are some lessons to validate if you’re with someone that makes sense for you.
7 Signs You’re in the Right Relationship with Someone
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Your Friends and Family Approve of Your Relationship
If you’ve ever dated someone in the past where you’re parents or close friends are questioning your decision, you better pay attention. While you may not want to hear about it, keep in mind that these people have your best intention in mind.
They’ve known you for a period of time. You have to consider what they have to say. Whoever you bring into your life has to fit in with your current relationships as well. If your friends and family give you a thumbs up, that’s a great sign.
You Can Talk About Anything Openly
Open communication is a huge part of any successful relationship. You have to be able to talk about how you feel and what’s on your mind.
You know you’re with someone worthwhile when there are no games being played. You don’t want to feel like you’re always walking on egg shells.
Empathy is the most important word in any relationship. Both of you should feel like you can say what you mean and mean what you say.
You Value Time Apart from Each Other
The biggest mistake that most people commit once they’re dating is they forget to have time to themselves. A healthy relationship is when two, independent people can co-exist and maintain their individuality.
Don’t neglect your hobbies and other things that are important to you. Not only will you give your relationship time to breathe, you’ll also have lots to talk about once both of you spend time together.
You Have Similar Core Values
Physical attraction is definitely where things start. But that’s not a good enough reason to date someone.
Once the honey moon phase wears off, there has to be a huge level of compatibility for the relationship to workout. Your core values should never be compromised. These are the things that make you who you are.
Make a list of things that are important to you. Is fitness important to you? Do you value travel and spontaneity? Heck, do you want to get married and have kids down the road?
Be bold and communicate that with the person you’re with very early on. Your significant other should share these core values with you.
You Don’t Dig Up Each Other’s Past
People make mistakes along the way. Their experiences in the past, both good and bad, have made them the person they are today.
Don’t ask questions that you’re not going to want to hear the answer. If it’s not going to make your relationship better, don’t bother bringing it up.
There are things in life that are better left unspoken. Let go of the need to know everything. Appreciate the person you’re with right now and who they’re aspiring to become.
You Can See Yourself Becoming a Better Person
Who you’re with should inspire you to become your best self. A great sign of a healthy relationship is when both people are very supportive of each other’s goals.
Build your partnership on mutual inspiration and motivation. Challenge each other to stay accountable with what they’re working towards.
You Appreciate the Little things
Everything is neutral until you show up and give it your own interpretation. Set your intention to come from a place of gratitude. That should be the lens that you view your relationship from.
When you’re thankful for what you have now in your partner, no matter how little, they will put more effort to give you more of that. You get exactly what you focus on.
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This post originally appeared at SocialManProject.com
Stock photo ID:1126844538
I like these 7 but I need to add number 8.
The other person needs to feel the same way. My 14 year relationship ended and when I look at the 7 signs, all of them were met, at least from my POV. If the other person doesn’t feel the same, forget signs 1-7.
Your Friends and Family Approve of Your Relationship While you may not want to hear about it, keep in mind that these people have your best intention in mind. You have to consider what they have to say. Whoever you bring into your life has to fit in with your current relationships as well. If your friends and family give you a thumbs up, that’s a great sign. Excuse you! This is fatuous, thoughtless, ignorant, one-size-fits-all bulk wrap. I’m fortunate to have survived growing up under my mother’s thumb, for example, and to have escaped with as little damage as… Read more »
Hey Daniel. Good point and very happy that you’ve built a great marriage despite your mother.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and personal experiences. However that includes the writer of this article. It’s not a personal attack towards you or your beliefs, so at the very least respect his thoughts and expressions too… whether you agree with them or not.
agreed! I appreciated many points in this article 🙂 good job!Nothing you read online should be taken as a life manual to follow 100%. Try to see them as suggestions if you’re going to read them and complain if they are not ideas you hold.
I agree with Ray on this one for the most part.
A person’s past is very much indicative of who they are now by either giving insight into why they have the values they do as well as of their character.
It is a bit important to know that the guy who just asked me out was recently released from a 20 yr stint for rape and domestic abuse, I would think.
Or if your potential lady friend has been married 4 times and those marriages ended because she was caught cheating.
I appreciate the feedback Ray, I’m always willing to hear what other people have to say about this topic and I’d like to invite you to share more of your thoughts.
“There are things in life that are better left unspoken.”
Not really! The past is quite best way to see how this person is going to work out in your life the more recent past the more important. So yeah, something done maybe 20 years ago – let it go. Something they did two years ago – quite important.
Burying things is never the answer. Quite the ignorant concept in this article.