Creating Ceremony Who knows what they were arguing about. One was taunting the other. The other retaliated. Or was it something that one had that the other one wanted? Whatever it was, the argument escalated into a knock-down-drag-out fight. I typically don’t referee my son’s arguments, but for this one I had to send them…
Healer In Training, Part 1
The Sorcerer’s Apprentice
New Rooms, Corridors, and Stairways One of my favorite character archetypes growing up, if not my favorite of all was the magician. The wise old sorcerer. In Disney’s rendition of the King Arthur legend, “The Sword in the Stone,” I was more interested in Merlin’s fantastical abilities than I was in Arthur’s rise to royalty.…
Heal Thyself First, Part 5
Risaterapia (Laugh Therapy)
All The Emotions, All At Once Our last day had arrived. Two weeks had passed. Our journey as a group of healers-in-training was ending. Our class about curanderismo at the University of New Mexico was, in a word, transformational. At times, I tried to use the words fun, energizing, amazing to describe the program, but…
Heal Thyself First, Part 4
Parteras de Alma
Saying Goodbye While medical professionals are often who help women deliver new souls into this world, midwives still play an integral role in this magical moment, and they have for centuries. Yet what happens on the other side of life, when souls are exiting this existence? Who helps usher them to the next place besides…
Heal Thyself First, Part 3
Herbs For Healing
Release In The Botanic Garden In a wide open lawn surrounded by tall shade trees, we called to the four directions for our morning ceremony. With the small drum I had brought to the ceremony, I stood in the second inner ring and banged the drum when we called each direction. Once on the ground,…
Heal Thyself First, Part 2
Rescuing My Inner Child
Loved and Always Protected Rita, la maestra, said we each have an inner child inside of us—un niñito—that needs to be loved and cared for. Protected. She said that child often has things they have not said to their mother and father. That child is often holding onto pain and fear from their past. The…
Heal Thyself First, Part I
In The Temazcal
The Therapy Worked On the drive to Bernalillo from the westside of Albuquerque, I binged on potato chips. I knew it wasn’t the best food choice, nor was it considered dinner. It was a snack, and the flyer instructed participants to “only eat lightly” before the temazcal. In Julie’s yard, we assembled as somewhat strangers.…
Tea with an Elder
On The Pathway to Spiritual Healing, Part 1
Sign From The Spirit Most people go to coffee shops to either drink coffee or work or both. That was my intention last Monday when I walked into Little Bear on Central Avenue in Albuquerque, NM. I however, was seeking green tea, since I’m not much of a coffee drinker, and I wanted to open…
Advance
How Men Use (and abuse) Time
Occupation or Obsession? A world-renowned and well-paid guru once said men are often like trains on tracks when it comes to goals. This can be especially true with things like projects or work. We often start something and follow it through with a mad obsession. No matter how long it might take us, we just…
Not a Commencement Speech
Pomp & Circumstance
Oh, The Places You Might Go Here’s what we know so far: Covid-19 is never going away, and it’s going around again. Regular colds and flus are going around, too. My family just dealt with one last week. Children and adults are being murdered by firearm at alarming rates in schools, grocery stores, and hospitals—the…
Our Most Important Citizens
In Memory of The Victims of the Uvalde Massacre
Fantasyland On previous visits to Frontierland, I always steered my boys away from the Shootin’ Exposition. If you’ve never seen it, it’s an Old Western-style rifle shooting range along the main passage into Frontierland inside of Disneyland. For fifty cents, you get about ten shots on a very authentic shot gun where you can aim…
Manners Matter
Gentlemen in Training
Politeness Wins The Day When I must pass in front of someone in a grocery store aisle, I still say “Excuse me.” When I order at a restaurant, I’m programmed to utter “May I please…” And I drop the universal, “Thank you,” maybe a little too much. For example, almost all of my business correspondence…
Strategic Recovery
Reclaiming Your Clock with Father Time
Build it into the System Mine is a 7 minute vintage Saturday Night Live sketch starring Rachel Dratch, Drew Barrymore, Jimmy Fallon, and Will Farrell. The four of them are soaking in a hot tub at the so-called Welshley Arms, with Dratch and Farrell as the frisky married professors Roger and Virginia Clarvin. They encourage…
I Love You, Man
Normalize How You Feel
Masculinity 2.0 – Detoxing our Worst Impulses
Meeting Our Heroes
They Don't Wear Capes
Our People, Our Heroes In total, Steve Almond and I have met only three times face to face. The first was at the Tin House Writers Workshop in 2007, where he was my workshop leader for a week. So, technically, I saw him every day for seven consecutive days. The second was about a year…
An Analog Revolution
Breaking the Addiction
We, Their Parents I read a hilarious Twitter post the other day: A father commented how his kids could not fathom that Netflix used to come in the mail. This father’s children thought the company emailed the movies to viewers. Logical thinking, I suppose, that all mail is electronic. The kids had no idea that…