Someone is perfect for everyone, and you will meet them when it’s meant to be. Well, good luck with that nonsense!
Like any other area of your life, relationship success requires work and effort. But, unfortunately, I have seen people believing in the idea of ‘the one even if that one is gaslighting them, giving them trauma, and basically ruining their life.
Finding a long-term partner is one of the most important decisions you will ever have to make. You have to be extremely smart and cautious about who you choose.
But believing that there is someone out there who is your soulmate has some problems:
- You think that you only have one person for you, whereas the truth is that there are lots of perfect partners for you out there,
- You believe that if you have to put effort into any relationship, it might not be meant for you; whereas the truth is that the success of any relationship demands work and effort,
- You are not actively looking for people to meet and just sitting at home and hoping that the right person will come at the right time; whereas the truth is that you have to go out there, meet people, and probably kiss a lot of frogs before you could find your prince charming.
Here’s some dating advice for you:
Attraction is Important
Sustainable love demands a foundation of attraction. So when you choose someone, do not let your mind take complete precedence over your heart, and pick someone you want to have, not someone you think you should have. The basis of attraction can be anything: looks, mindset, values, etc., but you must feel the desire to be with that person.
Character Matters
Judge if the other person’s actions match their words. Observe if they lie to get out of situations. You want to be with someone who you can trust. How do they behave in stressful situations? Do they react badly, or can they maintain their sense of calm? These small actions help you judge if the other person is mature enough to deal with the hardships of life and will be there for you when you need them.
Here are some detailed articles on things you must know to prepare yourself for dating and relationships:
Compulsory Requirements of a Healthy Relationship
Do you have the right mindset before entering into a relationship?
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If you have any questions, hit me up: [email protected]
Thanks for reading.
Check out my other pieces on relationships and life here: Bhanu Singhal
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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