In the early days of motherhood, I was so busy raising my baby that I no longer had an outside view of myself and our situation. “I just can’t get anything done”, I said to friends and family. Often I said this and it didn’t strike me as odd either.
Now, as my baby is growing and getting older, I have some time to rethink my situation, take an outside look at myself, my family, and our past together.
At 33, I’m at an age when it feels like my entire circle of friends decides to start planning a family — in Germany, the average age of a woman having her first child is 30 — so that fits. In the last months, I’ve heard this sentence so often again from young mothers: “I just can’t manage anything anymore.”
And this struggle I want to address today and say something against this statement.
To all the moms out there: you can probably manage quite a lot! Probably even more than you have ever managed before.
You give unconditional love.
You create basic trust.
You give a baby a start in life.
You are busy 24/7 with the thoughts of someone other than yourself.
You cuddle, kiss, and carry a little human being.
You feed and nourish a little person.
You invest time and loads of calories.
You might even give up your beloved job to have more time for your family.
You wash, cook, comfort, mop.
You change loads of diapers, day and night.
You are getting poo on you.
You are happy about a single smile.
You get a slap in your face with a rubber giraffe and even respond with a smile.
You create wonderful conditions for a new life.
You would give your life for your baby.
You are the springboard into your baby’s life, the trampoline that lets your child bounce powerfully and be caught again. You are the net that never tears.
You can’t manage anything? Maybe not the things that were important to you in your former life. But you manage something. A lot. Everything.
You create life.
This post was previously published on Medium.
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