Truths About Recovery

It’s not you – it’s your family system.

But it’s you, too. It’s time to talk about the necessity of weaning off external validation and learning to live a life aligned with one’s true self.

To heal, you need to do two things—learn to be okay with disappointing people and leave home emotionally. The rage that’s been building for all this time is ready to be released, and now you have to learn to live with it. All I can tell you is that your hurt, anger, and resentment hurt you, and you put way too much value in the people who raised you.

After this realization, loneliness will shine through, but you have to embrace it. If you need to find a surrogate family somewhere with somebody who’ll better mirror you, do it. You must start living your life your way and find the places important to you.

Have you ever asked yourself any of these questions? Do they not like me? What’s it going to be like when I show up? How are they going to guilt me and shame me? Then, you need to get a handle on those emotions of shame and guilt and start cutting emotional ties with toxic family systems.

It’s time to work through the impacts of generational trauma and learn the importance of developing self-love and independence. It’s time to achieve a fulfilled and authentic life built for you.

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Previously Published on joeryan.com

It’s Not You, It’s Your Trauma Podcast- Trauma, PTSD, Abuse, Anxiety & Recovery – with Joe Ryan

Real, genuine, vulnerable, and honest talk. There are no quick fixes from trauma, abuse, addiction, PSTD, or anxiety. Knowing what happened to you is only part of the process, we have to relive the feelings, emotions, and scenes we avoid. When we stop blaming, making excuses and take responsibility for our own emotions, that’s the start of moving from victim to surviving, from surviving to survivor and finally to thriving and teaching.

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